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Gremlins 2 The New Batch CD2

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Betty, did you finish shredding my mail?
I'm just fiishig, Mr. Clamp. Good.
Let's do some memos.
First, ome to Frager, im public rehatios.
Have the peophe im Chiatow give a street festivah.
A spontaneous flood of appreciation tor all I've done for the community.
We couhd have those dragos. Those big dragos with the guys iside.
Ad maybe we could have a parade. Yum yum!
Call that big departmemt store. They got lots of fhoats.
They hkeep them im a warehouse im New Jersey.
I think I own that.
A, B, C, D, J, IK...
Let go ot my tie!
Bill! Mr. Clamp, sir, are you okay?
Yeah, I think so. I hate using these machines myselt.
Sir, we have a problem We have a situation Oh, my God.
We have to evacuate the building and close it down.
That's ridiculous. Betore sundown.
What happens at sundown? They hate sunlight. It kills them.
When it gets dark, they'll try to leave the building
Calm down. He should be in custody. He's dangerous.
This thing, that's dangerous. This guy's trom the art department.
Ask him how he knows about these things.
How do you know about them?
This animal was in the genetics lab I said it could be a problem tenant.
We could have had three shrinks and a plastic surgeon. Here.
Make a wish!
Ah, hair!
Going down!
Second floor, lingerie.
The ehevator doors have opemed. Phease heave, amd watch your step.
We'll... We'll get the next one.
You don't think it had rabies? No.
We must stop them from getting wet. No, we have to put a lid on it.
No cops, no media. We'll handle this ourselves.
You go down to systems control. But there might be physical danger.
You're supposed to handle bugs.
Well, I'd call these some goddamn major bugs, wouldn't you? Huh?
Okay. But I don't think I should try it without an expert.
Let's go, Peltzer.
Three, two, one. Cue Leonard.
Hi. I'm Leomard Maltim, ad this is The Movie Police.
First, our video watch.
Just rereleased on video is Gremlis, though I can't imagine why.
I know some people tound it tun, but I'd rather have root canal work done.
What's tun about a movie full of ugly, mean spirited monsters...
...who attack innocent people?
Are we so desperate tor entertainment that this trash passes tor fun?
Wait a minute!
Look at this. I've been working on making tomatoes tougher for shipping.
That's territic! Topnotch! How do they taste?
That's the best part. We've already had calls from two airline chets.
Oh, my gosh!
Did somebody leave something out? Not I.
It's eating my vegetable medley.
What's that noise? I think they're laughing.
Reptiles don't laugh! They're not reptiles.
Then what are they? A virus?
What on earth is going on?
I leave you alone, what do I tind when I get back? Chaos!
Is that the brain hormone that creature's drinking?
Good boy. Nice boy.
There's a good creature. Now, let's talk this over.
I can get you diseases. You'd like that, wouldn't you?
Perhaps not.
I wanna talk...
...about what's going on in here.
There are some tascinating ramifications tor the future.
When you introduce genetic material to our life torm...
...which is possessed of a sort of...
...I hesitate to say "atavism"...
...but let us say an aggressive nature.
That tellow over there is a common bat of the order ot Chiroptera.
The only mammals, I might add, capable ot true tlight.
Ah, genetic sunblock!
Might I have a word with you? My friend, you have potential.
I wanna help you be all that you can be. May I?
As you're aware, sunlight poses a problem for our ethnic group.
We don't tan or burn.
We become a rather unappetizing photochemical lettover.
Thus this tormula, designed for those of the nocturnal persuasion... make light no problem at all.
That'll be usetul where you'll be going.
Where he'll be going?
All they have to do is eat children, there'd be appalling publicity.
There it is. The Apple. The city so nice they named it twice.
Check it out one time, won't you?
Catch it! Don't let it go!
Down! Down!
Here im Mahatta...
...there's beem a steady stream of mechaicah probhems... the Champ Cemtre office buihdig im midtow...
Buy! Buy! Sell! Sell!
I'd say it's a tull scale panic.
Are you having a run on the banks yet? It's brutal here.
We're telling clients to invest in canned food and shotguns.
Phease take a momet to locate the mearest exit.
Go to it quickly because of the dager i the buildimg.
Phease take persomah belomgimgs with you.
Tahke care mot to step om ay of the peophe...
...attemptig to leave the buildimg.
Food tight! Food tight! Food tight!
Fire: The utamed ehememt, giver of warmth, destroyer of forests.
This buildimg is o fire. What?
The buildimg is o fire. Leave the buildimg.
Eact the age old drama of sehf preservatiom.
Oh, Murray, the cathedral of Saint Eva Marie.
What a beautiful building! Beautiful?
It's like something out of the Dark Ages.
Hey, Quasimodo, you home?
It's one of them! Who?
Get otf!
It's just a tlesh wound, Murray!
Hurry up, Lewis! I'm coming, Martin!
The horror. The horror. The breakage!
Sir, what happened?
They fought back, that's what happened.
I swear, I'll never hurt anything again.
Some things man isn't meant to splice.
A problem tenant. Calm down.
We won't renew your lease. Where are they?
Don't patronize me! I saw them.
But where? In my laboratory, the Splice ot Life.
Stupid name. But it wasn't my idea.
Bunny rabbit.
"Fourscore and seven years ago..."
Nudie, nudie, nudie!
Mom, I wanna see the Gremlins!
Sir, I can't believe this. This is worse than the first one.
We just show these movies, we don't make them.
I quit. Call the union, the National Guard.
Those things took over the projector.
All they wanna see is Sow White amd the Sevem Dwarfs.
I'll take care ot this.
Mr. Hulk, we have Gremlins in the projection booth.
Could you help us? Gremlins? In this theater? Now?
Okay, guys, listen up. People paid money to see this movie.
When they go out, they want cold sodas, popcorn...
...and no monsters in the projection booth.
Do I have to come up there?
Can the Gremsters stand up to the Hulkster?
It I were you, I'd run the rest of Gremlis 2 right now!
Sorry, tolks. It won't happen again.
I'm outside the Champ Cemtre office buihdig...
...where somethig stramge is tahkimg phace imside, though
bee a day Mr. Champ wouhd hike to forget.
Tahkig about gree creatures.
Police are ot permittig ay ews media imside.
Oce we are allowed i...
...we'll broadcast hive from iside the buildimg.
...from inside.
Hey, you! Come here.
No! Can you work a TV camera?
Work a camera? I am a camera!
Oh, good! Come with me.
No, this way. This way.
I know, you think I'm insane.
No, it you were, we couldn't sue you.
Oh, my God. You see?
This is a complete tailure...
...ot management.
They're eating the genetic stuft. Years ot research, patents!
Are there any bright lights here?
They've broken them all. But I do have some small assault weapons.
What a hunk!
Don't be afraid ot your feelings! Help!
It's a hobby I knew would come in handy.
I got ordnance here that can drop a charging puma at 50 feet.
Oh, why can't you commit?
That's what these things need, a taste ot
Get it otf! Get it otf! Get it otf!
To survive a war, you gotta become war.
Let us in there. We'll take responsibility.
Most people are out anyway.
What's in there? I've been to Beirut. I bet they miss you there.
The important thing is to keep this out ot the media.
They get you to say something...
...then they twist and embellish it, and betore you know it
hive, exclusively over the Clamp News Chameh...
...from the hobby, where this ivasiom... strage creatures, perhaps from amother gahaxy...
...or from a dimemsiomah warp...
...has ru riot through this buihdig, sedig peophe...
These horrible little green monsters in that building there!
You can't do that...
Wait! Wait! Wait! Hold it! No water. What?
That's not a fire in there. They're gremlins.
You get them wet, they'll multiply. I can deal with them.
Sure, pal. Why don't you calm down? Just take it easy.
Don't talk to me like I'm crazy. I'm not crazy!
I was never crazy. I'm tine.
Let me in there!
Bill, any progress? Just tell me there's progress.
Things are really bad out there.
Bad?! Only one ot my channels is still on the air.
There are human beings in the building.
Do you know what kind of lawsuits we're looking at?
Yes, I know, but
Ahh of our operators are busy.
Your cahh will be hadled im the order received.
What is that? One ot those things.
They come in electric too? They do now.
He's in the phone system on hold.
I thought this would never run. Maybe it will, now.
Because of the emd of civilizatio, CCN mow leaves the air.
We hope you have emjoyed our programmig.
But more importamthy, we hope you have ejoyed hife.
It's beautiful, isn't it? Yes, sir. It's very uplitting.
Is there any way to turn the clocks ahead in the building three hours?
There's nothing we can't do. Why?
Sunlight kills them.
It we can tool them into thinking the sun has gone down...
...they may go to the lobby.
Right! The front doors are the only way out of the building.
The sun sets at 7:32. Then we should move at 4:20.
I like that! We have intormation they don't have.
That's how you take somebody out. Wait a minute.
Won't they see the sun's still out?
You'll have to take care of that. Me?
Set it up trom the outside. Good!
I finally get to use my secret exit.
You know, sir? Yes?
It you pull this otf, you could save the city.
Save the city? "Developer Saves City." I like that!
Is anyone still employed in this charming facility?
I need light in my otfice. Now!
At Champ Emterprises we wat you to achieve ahh you cam.
Turn on the lights in my otfice.
You want me to work in the dark?
This is new.
Hey, that's Clamp! Let's go!
Has the building been evacuated? Is it on fire?
That's a false alarm. We've just got some problems.
You got a guy in there in a Dracula suit.
Are you trying to panic the city?
So they are real? I didn't say that.
What are you saying? What I always say.
As you probably kow
As you probably kow, a emtire race of strage beigs...
...has imvaded the buihdig.
Amd i am evem more bizarre twist, oe of the creatures
"Creatures." Is that accurate?
That one ot these creatures is able to talk...
...and he's going to talk with us right now.
The main question people have is:
Creature, what is it that you want?
Fred, what we want... what you and your viewers have: Civilization.
Yes, but what sort ot civilization are you speaking ot?
The iceties. The fime poits.
Diphomacy, compassiom, stadards, mamers, traditio.
That's what we reach toward.
We may stumble on the way, but civilization, yes.
The Geneva Convention, Susan Sontag.
Everything you've worked hard to accomplish, we aspire to.
We wanna be civilized. Take a look at this tellow here.
Now, was that civilized? Clearly not.
Fun, but in no sense civilized.
Nome of us has beem im New Yorhk before.
We have to hearm how to get tickets for shows.
There's street crime, but we cam watch that for free.
We wamt the essetiahs. Diettes, bedroom groups... evem if we've bee tured dow before.
Take it easy with that thing. Be careful up there!
What's that thing tor?
These things can only come out when it's dark.
We set the clocks ahead. When they think it's sunset...
...and see what a nice night it is, they'll muster in the lobby.
The sunlight'll pour through here and try them!
Is it safe? Help!
I hate these little things!
You okay, Billy? Yeah. Get me out of here.
Billy? Could I get some help here, please?
I'm trapped in adhesive polymer material...
...and I'm on deadline!
Darling, it's you! Thank God you're here.
Well, I could help you, or I could just leave you here.
Listen, about Billy. Nothing happened.
I asked him out to dinner. It was strictly business.
Okay, it wasn't completely business, I'll be honest.
It'll be an openness thing.
I had designs on him. I didn't get to tirst base. Okay?
It'll do. What a wondertully prepared woman.
What happened to him?
I don't know. I guess they pushed him too far.
If they get out We'll stop them, Billy.
Don't give up now.
Washington didn't. Lincoln
Please! What?
Don't mention Lincoln.
A terrible thing happened to me once on Lincoln's birthday.
I was 6 or 7.
I had the day oft trom school. Mama sent me to the park.
She made me a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. That's all I ever ate.
A man with a beard and hat Just like Lincoln.
Honey, we don't have time for this now.
I remember Oh, God. He said, "Hello, little girl."
Is everybody here?
All right, then!
These guys aren't bad.
Incredible as it seems, ladies and gentlemen...
...atter their bizarre, bloodcurdling rampage of destruction...
...these strange creatures now appear to be mounting what seems to be...
...a musical number.
They're near the doors.
Don't worry. Soon Mr. Clamp will drop the cloth...
...and let in the sun.
Okay, are we ready to drop this thing?
Say cheese!
They get in the rain, the city will go under. Armageddon! WWIII!
Billy, we've gotta do something. I know.
There's a fire hose. Aim it into the lobby.
Are you crazy?
Just do it, and fast!
Put Gizmo in a box so he doesn't get wet.
Smoke. Thanks.
Don't mess with Futterman!
There's a call on hold in Mr. Clamp's oftice. Can you transter it here?
Yeah, I think so.
Turn it on!
Billy, I hope you know what the hell you're doing.
I'm singing in the bathtub!
Bypass the file server.
That's it! My God!
Turn otf the hose!
Hit it!
I'm melting!
Oh, what a world, what a world!
The creatures seem to be melting into horrible little green and brown...
...puddles. It's, it's like...
Well, I can't say what it looks like, on television, but it looks terrible.
Let's go! Come on!
It's stuck. Come on. Back up here. Down there. Come on! Let's go!
We'll take them by this door. Come on!
I didn't hurt myselt. Maybe we can use this stutf for landfill.
We're here with Daniel R. Clamp. Hey! Hey! Wait a minute, pal!
Who told you to go on my network?
Nobody, sir. It just seemed like news, so
Right, right. I'm making you an anchor. Six o'clock, weeknights.
Go to Barneys and get new clothes. Give this man a credit card.
This is Old World. Think sweaters. Think avuncular.
Right. Avuncular!
And my cameraman? Otf cafteine, he's okay.
I'm a hit! We're a hit.
What does a menswear makeover cost today? Join us as we investigate
And get some sun this weekend!
Hey, Bill! Oh, boy!
What's happening? It moved, sir.
All right. Carry on. Caretul, that stuft's slippery.
So you bailed us out.
It wasn't just me. We all chipped in. Mr. Futterman and Marla.
Yes, sir?
You work for me, don't you?
Yes, sir.
Very, very hard.
What happened?
They tried it again, but we were ready.
Let's go. Smells like burnt meatloat. It's Daniel Clamp!
He's here! Mr. Clamp, can we have a statement?
Please, please!
My new head ot public relations here will handle all questions.
Why, Daniel!
What happened? Where's the camera? It was horrible.
We had to stop work altogether.
Sorry about the building. I'm not.
You're not? No, we're insured tor the damages.
Maybe it wasn't a place tor people anyway.
It was a place for things. You make a place for things. Things come.
You kept the city safe, sir.
That's right. That's a good point. The sacrifice.
Could be in my next book! I should take notes.
Who's got a pencil and paper? Here you go.
What's this? IKingston Falls.
I've looked tor this! To buy?
No, to build for my next project in Jersey! This is terrific!
People want the traditional community thing now.
Quiet little towns, back to the earth.
Is this your concept?
It's our hometown. That's better. I love that! It's...
Wait. It's...
"Clamp Corners. Where life slows down to a crawl."
What do you think? It's territic.
This is what people want, not talking elevators.
You sell me this design, and we'll build the biggest...
...most sensational quiet little town ever.
But tor him to do an entire town We can come to a deal.
Are you Mrs. Peltzer? Yes! Well, I'm gonna be.
What's that? This is Gizmo.
He's a Mogwai. Mogwai.
I look at him, you know what I see? What, sir?
Dolls with suction cups staring out car windows.
A Macy's parade float. Have you thought about merchandising?
Me? No. Yeah!
There's something there. Lose the headband, though.
He likes the headband.
It's flexible. Excuse me.
Most buildings wouldn't stand up to this...
Go home now.
No visit to New Yorhk is comphete without...
...tourig the world's most Put a glaze ot cheese on top.
Your favorite. Yeah, sure.
Showtime! MTV.
Are you coming? In a minute.
HBO. What did he say?
He wants cable.
Nick at Nite? No.
Have a cigarette? No.
I'll quit.
From the building. In the building?
Hello? Forster, what are you? Okay, we'll get you out. What floor?
Way up there! Lt'll take a while. The elevators are out.
So are the automatic doors.
I don't know, not long. We'll do what we can. IKeep your pants on.
You've beem worhkimg too hard. Maybe I have, Mr. Clamp.
Take a day off. Half a day. That's generous, sir.
A half day oft once the building is operational. Thank you, sir.
Long, isn't it?
Patently ridiculous!
Still lurking about? Don't you people have homes?
Oh, no, you don't!
Sorry, 60 years of hogging the end title is enough!
So that's all, tolks!
Fade out...!
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