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Galaxy Quest

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- Exiting the time knot now, sir.|- We're alive !
We made it, Commander.|We made it.
By Grabthar's hammer,|we live to tell the tale.
Systems registering functional.
All systems are|working, Commander.
I don't like it.|It was too easy.
- Wait ! Oh, no.|They're everywhere !
- There are time knots|opening everywhere !|- A trap !
We're surrounded,|Commander.
- Aah !|- Ooh !
It's a core meltdown, sir.|It can't be stopped.
Surrender may be|our only option.
No ! Never give up !
Never surrender !
Your orders, sir ?
Sir ?|Group orders ?
Activate the Omega 13.
- Well ?
Huh ?|Well, there you are.
- Yeah ! Huh ?
Yeah ! Yeah, that's|what I'm talking about.
You are the first people|to see the lost Galaxy Quest--
episode 92|two-parter--
since it was originally aired|in 1982 !
- Huh ? Yeah ! All right.
And now, the moment you've|all been waiting for--
the intrepid crew|of the N.S.E.A. Protector !
- Yeah ! Yeah !
[ Man ]|Red scarf, black shoes. Wait.
White scarf, black buttons,|white shoes.
Man, where in the hell is he ?|An hour and a half late ?
- An hour and a half.|- I mean, this is unreal.
They're gonna start|eating each other out there.
Oh, did you hear ? He booked|another appearance without us.
You're kidding.
Oh. Uh--|Um--
- How did I come to this ?|- Not again.
- I played Richard the Third.|- Five curtain calls.
There were five curtain calls.|I was an actor once, damn it !|Now look at me. Look at me !
I cannot go out there,|and I won't say...
that stupid line|one more time !
- I can't, I won't.|- Well, Alex, at least you had a part.
Okay ? You had|a character people loved.
I mean, my TV Guide interview|was six paragraphs...
about my boobs and how they|fit into my suit.
No one even bothered to ask me|what I do on the show.
You had the-- Wait.|Wait, I'll think of it.
- I repeated the computer, Fred.|- Whew !
Your commander is on deck !|Ha, ha !
Wow, that smog|is thick today, huh ?
- Am I too late for|Alexander's panic attack ?
Apparently not. You know,|you should get that looked at.
Let's take a look at a few more clips.
Okay.|What did I do ? Hmm ?
We want the crew !|- What ?
- We want the crew !|- For those four seasons,|we developed the same affection...
for the crew as the crew|had for each other.
These weren't just adventurers|exploring space.
- Friends.|- These were friends.
- Unbelievable.|- You are so full of it, man !
It's not a big deal ! These guys|put a little set in their basement.
I'm there about an hour.|It's nothing, Gwen.
They wanted|the Commander.
- There he goes.|- Alexander, wait a minute.|Grab him ! Grab him !
- We want the crew ! We want the crew !|- Okay !
Yeah !|Here we go !
Come on, old friend.|Old friend.
You stole all my best lines.|You cut me out of episode two entirely.
- Excuse me.|- Tawny Madison--|my personal favorite--
- Gwen DeMarco !
Yeah !
Yeah, that's what I'm talkin' about !|Let's hear a warm welcome...
for crack gunner Laredo--|Tommy Webber !
- You will go out there !|- I won't,
and nothing you say|will make me.
- The show must go on.|- Freddie Kwan !
- Damn you.
Damn you. I won't say|that stupid line one more time.
Tev'Meck--|Alexander Dane !
Yeah !|All right !
By Grabthar's hammer,|you shall be avenged !
Yeah !|All right !
That guy can act.|And finally,
my-- my fellow|Questerians,
the brave Commander|of the N.S.E.A. Protector,
Peter, Peter, Peter,|Peter, Peter,
Quincy, Quincy, Quincy, Quincy,|Taggart, Taggart, Taggart Taggart--
- Jason Nesmith ! Yes !
We love you, Commander !
- Never give up, never--|Never surrender !
Damn the resonance cannons,|full speed ahead ! Huh ?
The Commander and his crew|will be signing autographs...
on lmperial decks "C" and "B"|near the Coke machines.
Whoo ! Quest forever, man !
Excuse me, pardon me.|Crew member coming through.
- Fans, right ? Hey, Gwen.|- Oh, hey, man.
I want to thank you for that|nice intro you gave us today.
- Um--|- Guy.
You probably don't remember me,|do you ? It's the sunglasses, right ?
I was on the show in '82,|episode 81.
Got killed by a lava monster|before the first commercial. Aaah !
Listen, uh-- Maybe I could sit in|and, uh, sign a couple autographs ?
By Grabthar's hammer, by the sons|of Warvan, I shall avenge you !
- By Grabthar's--|- Next.
Had I moved an inch to the left,|the beast would have killed me.
- On the other hand,|my crew was in danger.|- How did you know what to do ?
Come on ! Without my crew,|I'm not a commander, huh ?
I think we all remember what happened|to that beast on Enok Seven, right ?
You've gotta admit,|they really do love him.
Yeah, almost as much|as he loves himself.
Excuse me, Commander.|Hey !
I was wondering if you|could help settle a dispute|my crew and I seem to be having.
Um, if you remember, uh,|in "Quasar Dilemma--"
Excuse me|for a minute, fellas.
I hadn't even gotten|to the relevant conundrum.
In episode 15,|"Mist of Delos Five,"
I got the feeling that you and|the Commander kind of had a thing.
- Did you ?|- No.
The Commander and I|never had a thing.
Well that's|her story.
Excuse me.
Gwen. Gwen.
- Commander.|- Excuse me.
I must speak to you.|It is a matter of supreme importance.
We are Thermians|from the Klatu Nebula...
and we... need your help.
Oh, oh, oh.
Is this about|that gig tomorrow ?
Just hammer out the details|with my agent, and make sure|there's a limo at my house.
Last time I did one of these gigs,|they shoved me in the back of a Toyota.
Remember,|mum's the word.
- Certainly, but um--|- Mum.
- Mum. Mum.|- Mum.|- Mum.
Look here.|And... beautiful.
Crewman Madison.|The mist of this strange planet...
is filling my head|with such thoughts.
It was cute when I|didn't know you.
What a freak show, man.|Oh, this is hilarious.
Bunch of losers ! Beggin'|for autographs at 15 bucks a pop.
- These guys haven't had|a real acting job for 20 years.
- This is all they've got.|- Did you check out Nesmith ?
He actually gets off on those retards|thinking he's a space commander !
- Yeah ! Oh, and his friends ?|- I know !
They can't stand him ! Did you|hear them ragging on him in there ?
Dude, he has no idea he's|a laughingstock, even to his buddies.
- He's pathetic !|- Ooh, come on, come on.
The Galaxy Quest Dancers|are almost on.
Whoo ! Full speed ahead,|Lieutenant.
Hey, Commander,|uh, so, as I was saying,
in "The Quasar Dilemma," remember,|you used the auxiliary of deck B--
could you get this--|deck B for gamma override.
The thing is is that|online blueprints clearly indicate...
that deck B is independent|of the guidance matrix.
So, we were wondering|just where the error lies in that.
It's just a television show.|That's all, okay ?
Right, but--
'Cause we were wondering if the quantum|flux-- Now, just listen on this--
There is no|quantum flux !
There's no auxiliary.|There's no goddamn ship !
You got it ?
I mean it.|I mean it, Alex.
I've never seen him lose it like that.|Not to a fan.
I mean, it was|just weird.
Gwen, I have|said it for years.
He's mentally unstable.
l-- I'm worried.
It just was not|like him.
As long as there|is injustice,
whenever a Targathian baby|cries out,
- wherever a distress signal|sounds among the stars,
-we'll be there-- this fine|ship, this fine crew.|-This fine ship, this fine crew.
- Never give up and never surrender.|- Never give up.
Never surrender.
- Can I help you ?|- Sir, I understand this is|a terrible breach in protocol--
- You guys shouldn't come|to my house, man.|- I beg you to hear our plea.
We are Thermians|from the Klatu Nebula.
Our people are being systematically|hunted and slaughtered...
by Roth'h'ar Sarris|of Fatu-Krey.
We are to meet in negotiation.|However, our efforts in this|regard have been disastrous.
Please, Commander.|You are our last hope.
- We have secured our limousine.|- What ?
Oh, oh, oh, oh.
Um, it's the thing|for the thing that's, um--
Maybe I should get some pants on.
Come on in.
- Commander,
I must say that standing here|in your presence...
is the greatest honor we could have|ever hoped to achieve in our lifetimes.
That's-- I really|appreciate that.
Would you guys look for another shoe|that looks like this, please ?
Sir, I am Lahnk,|senior requisition officer.
Before we travel to the ship, please let|me know if you have any requirements.
- Weapons, documents, personnel ?|- Um, a Coca-Cola ?|Do you have one of those ?
- Sir, I am Teb.
I would like to explain|the history between our people...
- and the Sarris Dominion|in greater detail.|- Hey, how ya doin' ?
In the five million years|following the Great Nebula Burst,
- our people were one p--|- What's your name ?
- Doesn't she talk ?|- Her translator is broken.
- Okeydokey.
You know, guys, I had a late night|with a Kreemorian Fangor beast,
so I'm gonna just|shut my eyes for a bit.
Go on. You know. I'm listening|to everything you say, okay ?
In the five million years|following the Great Nebula Burst,
our people|were one people.
But then came the Zactor Migration,|and then the Melosian Shift,
dark period of discontent|once spread through the land.
Fighting among Treeb sects|and Largoths-- ah, the foolishness.
And it was in this time|of dissension that Sarris--
- Commander. Commander.|- Hmm.
I'm sorry to wake you, sir,|but your presence is requested|on the command deck.
- Sir, Sarris has moved the deadline.
We are approaching his ship|at the Ni-delta now.
He wants an answer|to his proposal.
Yeah, I got most of it in the car.|Sarris is the bad guy, right ?
Oh, yes, sir.|He's a very bad man indeed.
He has tortured our scientists, put us|to work in the gallium arsenide mines,
- Mm-hmm.|- captured our females|for his own demented purposes--
Yeah, yeah, I got the picture.|Do you have pages or do you|just want me to wing this ?
- I am not sure I understand you.|- Commander.
- Welcome to the Protector Two.|- Good to see ya.
- Would you like to don your uniform ?|- I'd like to skip that.
I got this gig in Van Nuys in about a|quarter of an hour. Is that all right ?
- As you wish.|- Sir, it's Sarris.
He's here.
General, I just received word|the Thermians have appointed|a new commander...
to handle|the negotiations.
What ?
This is great. You know, usually|it's just cardboard walls in a garage.
- Sir, we apologize|for operating in low-power mode,|- Oh. Oooh.
but we are experiencing|a reflective flex field|this close to the galactic axis.
You know what I could use ?|A cup holder and a couple of Advil.
We're approaching in five ticks, sir.|Command to slow ?
Set it on screen saver two.
Because we, you know-- We gotta--
Oh, I'm sorry|to break the mood here.
Um, slow it down|to mark two, Lieutenant.
I see fear.
- That is expected.|- Mm-hmm.
- Ahh, they bring a new commander.|- It's good.
- Here are my demands.|- It's scary.|I mean, you know, he looks...
- And if I do not hear what I like,|- real.
then there will be blood...
and pain|as you cannot imagine !
- First, I require...|- Backwash.
the Omega 13.
Second, I will require|a technician--
Okeydokey. Let's fire blue particle|cannons full. Red particle cannons full.
Gannet magnets,|fire them left and right.
And let 'em run all chutes.|And while you're at it,
why don't you toss that|at 'em, killer ?
That should take care of|old lobster head, shouldn't it ?
Commander,|where are you going ?
- Home.|- You-- You mean Earth ?
Yeah, Earth. I need|to get back to Earth, kids.
But the negotiation.|You-You fired on him.
- Yeah, yeah. Long live--|What was your planet called ?|- Thermia.
- Long live Thermia. This way ?|- But what if Sarris survives ?
- I doubt it. I gave him both barrels.|- He has a very powerful ship.
If you got any more problems|with the guy, just give me a call.
- Ow !
- An interstellar vox.|- A what ? Hey.
- How can we thank you, Commander ?
You-- You have saved|our people.
Yeah. Okay. You know, you kids|have been great. You really have.
This thing is real lookin'.|Yoo-hoo. Hello ?
Hey ! Where's my limo ?
Huh ?
Take it from us.|We've been all over the universe.
But we've never seen space-age values|like we've seen here at--
Tech Value|Electronic Superstore !
By Grabthar's hammer,
what a savings.
All right !
Yeah. Let's hear it|for the N.S.E.A. Protector.
- Brandon, are you okay ?|- Commander.
My apologies.
Evidently, we had a little|miscommunication regarding...
the voyage.
That you didn't show up.
- He did it again.|Thank you for coming out.
Do you know what time it is ? Why do|you even bother to show up at all ?
N-N-N-Not now.|Guys, I was there.
I was up there.|Remember yesterday at the convention ?
Those people dressed like aliens ?|They were aliens.
They were Termites or Dalmatians.|I can't really remember|'cause I was hungover.
But what they built|was .
It was a huge spaceship.|I got to fight this guy named Sarris|and I kicked his ass.
I know what you're thinkin'.|But I can prove it. They gave me this.
No, no, no, no, no. But can you|talk to people in space on those ?
Protector,|this is the commander. Over.
- Oh, for God's sake.|- That's it. It's time to go !
This isn't mine.
- That kid. Where's that kid ?|- Begging your pardon, Commander ?
We come with news.|Sarris lives.
- He was able upon your departure|to make an escape.|- Listen. Tell them.
- However, he has contacted us|and wishes to negotiate a surrender.|- Sarris.
We humbly implore you to come|and negotiate the terms.
Huh ? They want me back ?|You want me back ?
Is this amazing ? They want me back, and|I want you guys to go with me. Please ?
Think about it.|Let's go. Yes !
You're-- You're goin' ?
Alexander, this is not--|I'm not kiddin' here.
This isn't some kind of prank.|I'm not kiddin'.
No, guys, guys, listen.|Come on. Gwen, Gwen, Gwen.
Stop. Come here. You know me, and|I'm a lot of things, but am I crazy ?
You know, it's one thing|to treat us this way.
It's another thing to do it|to your fans.
She's not a fan.|This is-- This is a Termite !
You should've just|let me hit him.
Boy, I didn't know|you could get that loaded.
I think we should've|just taken the gig.
I mean, who knows|the next time he'll ask us ?
Fred, he was drunk. Do you really think|he was talking about a job ?
- But you live with your mother.|- Did Jason come through here ?
Yeah, he's in there.|Hey, guys.
Ah. We are coming too.
- All of you wish to go to the ship ?|- Yes, we wish to go to the ship.
You see, we work together,|or not at all.
Wonderful. The commander|had me continue transmission|in case you changed your mind.
- Protector, requesting|four interstellar--|- Me too.
five pods|for immediate departure.
- Guys.|- I look forward to meeting you all...
in person when you|arrive at the ship.
- End transmission.
- Oh, my God.
- Anybody got any change ?
Our most sincere apologies.
- We forgot about|our appearance generators.|- You guys came.
Who wants the grand tour ?
- Anybody else ?
That was a hell of a thing.
- What's wrong with them ?|- I don't know. Come on.
That's right, guys.|Keep shaking it off. It gets better.
- Try some gum. It helps.|- Where are we ?
The twenty-third quadrant|of the gamma sector.|There's a map in the forward room.
I'll show you.|Come on.
- Welcome, my friends.|- This is Mathesar. He's their leader.
I am Mathesar.|On behalf of all my people,
I wish to thank you from|the deepest place in our hearts.
Mathesar,|this is, uh, my crew.
Dr. Lazarus.
Dr. Lazarus. Dr. Lazarus.
Lieutenant Madison.
Lieutenant Madison.
Young Laredo,|how you've grown.
Young Laredo.
Tech Sergeant Chen.
Tech Sergeant Chen. Tech Sergeant Chen.
C-Crew man number--|Guy.
You... know us ?
I don't believe there is a man, woman|or child on my planet who does not.
Since we first received transmission|of your historical documents,
we have studied every facet|of your missions and strategies.
- You've been watchin' the show ?|- Lieutenant, historical documents.
- H-Historical documents from out here ?|- Yes.
The past hundred years our society|had fallen into disarray.
Our goals, our values had become|scattered. But since the transmission,
- we have modeled every aspect|of our society...
from your example,|and it has saved us.
Your courage and teamwork|and friendship through adversity--
In fact, all you see around you|has been taken from the lessons...
garnered from|the historical documents.
- Is this a-- a spaceship ?|- No.
This is a star port|for the ship.
Would you guys|like to see the ship ?
Oh, my God !
It's real.
The generator room.
The beryllium sphere,|of course.
And as we continue--
The medical quarters|are to the left.
We went through some trouble|duplicating your cellular regeneration--
- Jason, what have you got us into ?|- What are we doing here ?
- Wow, the floors are so clean.|- We're just here to negotiate|this guy Sarris' surrender.
- It's no big deal.|- And the organ fabrication chamber|is coming along nicely.
It's no big deal ?
- Are you crazy ?|We have to get out of here.|- Oh, come on, guys.
Jason, we are actors,|not astronauts.
You guys wanna go home ?|Say the word, we'll go home.
Pay our bills,|feed our fish,
fall asleep in front of the TV|and miss out on all of this.
Come on. Do you guys|wanna do that ? Anybody ?
Gwen, come on.|Look at where we are. We're in space.
Alexander, this is the role|of a lifetime. You guys wanna leave ?
We have enjoyed preparing|many of your esoteric dishes.
Your Monte Cristo sandwich is a current|favorite among the adventurous.
The main barracks.
At ease.
It's like throwing gasoline|on a flame.
What ?
I'm just jazzed about|being on the show, man.
lf you would all take your positions.
- Our what ?|- Guys.
- Oh. Oh.|- Oh.|- Oh, wh-- Hmm.
Look, this thingy.
I remember--|I remember I had it all worked out.
This is forward.|This is back.
Commander, some of the crew|has requested to be present|at this historic event.
Sure. Bring 'em in.
No pressure, huh ?|Glad I ain't the commander.
Laredo, take us out.
- Excuse me ?
They designed those controls|after watching you.
- Take her out.|- Right, right.
Right.|Take her out.
Y-you gotta move|to the right.
- Hit parallel.|- Would you sit your ass down ?|Sit ! You wanna drive ?
Oh. Mmm.
How are you enjoying|your steak, Commander ?
I'm really enjoying it.|This is like corn-fed lowa beef.
Yes. We programmed|the food synthesizer...
for each of you based on|the regional menu of your birthplace.
I don't care where|you did it. It tastes great !
Are you enjoying your|Kep-mok bloodticks, Dr. Lazarus ?
Just like Mother|used to make.
So, um--|Tell me, Mathesar.
This Sarris person|that we're flying to meet,
- what does he want, exactly ?
He heard about the device--|the Omega 13.
Um, what is it ?|What does it do ?
We don't know.
We were hoping|you could enlighten us.
Oh.|The Omega 13 device.
We found that on an alien planet.|We don't know what it does either.
- Why don't you just turn it on|and see what it does ?
It has at its heart a reactor|capable of unthinkable energy.
If we were mistaken in our construction,|the device would...
act as a molecular explosive,|causing a chain reaction...
that would obliterate|all matter in the universe.
Has Sarris ever seen any|of the, uh, historical records ?
No, thank God, he has not.
Oh. So how does he know about|the Omega 13 device ?
Our former commander|was not... strong.
Former commander ?
I am sorry.|You deserve to be shown.
The tape was smuggled off|of Sarris' ship.
Originally, one of our own|tried to lead.
Is that all ?|After three days of this,
you still require...|incentive ?
I have told you all I know.
If you have any mercy within you,|please, let me die.
[ Sarris ] When I grow weary|of the noises you make, you shall die.
Wait a minute, guys. Come on.|Hold on a minute. You just can't leave.
- Give me some time to think.|- He wants to think.
No, Jason, that's a wrap.|There's nothing to think about.
I'm not even supposed to be here. I'm|just crewman number six. I'm expendable.
I'm the guy in the episode who dies|to prove the situation is serious.|I gotta get out.
- Commander ?|- We gotta prepare the pods|for my crew's departure.
Begging your commander's pardon, sir.|We can't launch pods at the moment.
- Sarris will surely detonate|any objects leaving the ship.|- Sarris ?
Yes, sir. He's here now. Your presence|is required on the command deck.
There's nobody here.
While my people are|talented scientists,
our attempt to operate|our own technologies...
under tactical simulation|have been disastrous.
- I have raised Sarris|on zeta frequency.|- Mathesar--
We meet again, Commander.
Hello, Sarris. How you doin' ?
Better than my lieutenant.
He failed to activate the ship's|neutron armor as quickly as I'd hoped...
on our last encounter.
Yeah, well, you know,|I'd like to say I'm real sorry|about what happened before.
The whole thing was just--|just a misunderstanding.
Deliver the device to me,
or I will destroy your ship.
You know, um,|we'd like do that,
but frankly, Sarris, sir, we don't know|what it is or even where it is.
You have ten seconds !
I don't-- Ten seconds ?|I don't-- There--
You know-- Okay. Gosh darn it,|I give up. It's yours. You can have it.
You have to give me a minute|to put it in a box for you, okay ?
- Gwen.
Don't panic. I've dealt with|this guy before. He's as stupid|as he is ugly. Come here.
- Jason.|- Not now, Gwen. Sit, sit, sit, sit.
We're gonna send everything|we can at him, all right ?
- Jason.|- Not now, Gwen !
Push these red buttons and send|everything we have towards him, okay ?
- Okay.|- All right, Gwen.
- Put me back on with him.|- Well, I'm trying to tell you,|you are back with him.
Perhaps I'm not as stupid|as I am ugly, Commander.
I gave you the...|"kill" gesture.
No, you gave me|the "we're dead" signal.
I was agreeing with you.|Like I know where the hold button is.
Hey, guys.
- There's a red, uh, thingy...
movin' toward the green thingy.
- What ?|- Red thingy movin'|toward the green thingy.
I think-- I think|we're the green thingy.
A little present|for you, Commander.
We gotta get out of here. Move|this ship. Turn it. Move ! Let's go !
- Tommy, let's go !|Get us out of here !|- Jason, what do I do ?
Go, go, go !
Whoo !
They're turning.|They're coming !
Thrust ahead, full !
Fire at will.
- Go faster, Tommy !
- I'm going as fast as I can !|- She's still behind us !
Well, uh, uh, press turbo. I'm always|saying, "Press the turbo," right ?
- Oh, it's here. Right here.|- Press it and hold it down.
- Whoo !
The enemy is matching velocity.
- Enemy is matching velocity.|- We heard it the first time !
Gosh, I'm doing it.|I'm repeating the darn computer.
Hi, guys. Listen.|They're tellin' me...
the, uh-- the generators|won't take it.
The ship is breakin' apart|and all that.
Just F.Y.I.
- We've gotta stop !|- We stop and we die.|Tommy, just hold that down.
- You don't hold the turbo down.|It's for quick boosts !|- Oh, like you know.
- I remember that sound.
That's a bad sound.
Wait, wait, wait, wait. We might be able|to lose them in this cloud here.
Oh, I don't--|I don't think that's a cloud.
- Mathesar, what is this ?|- Tothian minefield left standing|from the Great War of 12185.
Oh, God !|Whoo !
Could you possibly try|not to hit every single one ?
Sorry, man. They're driftin'|towards us ! I think they're magnetic !
Continue forward, sir ?
Patience, Lieutenant.
- We've gotta stop !|- We're almost through this.
- You okay ? You all right ?|- Yeah.
- Everybody all right ? Where's Tommy ?
- Oh, man !|- Tommy ! You all right ?
No, my arm is broke--|No, don't touch it. Don't touch it.
- I'll take him to medical quarters.|- Thanks, Mathesar.
Alex, where are you going ?
To see if there's a pub.
Forward thruster shaft:|87 percent damage.
Aft vector guards:|96 percent damage.
Structural breaches|in quadrants 32, 34, 40--
- What about the engines ?|- Forward thruster shaft:
- 87 percent damage.|- Computer, what about the engines ?
- Why don't we have power ?|- The beryllium sphere|has fractured under stress.
- It's fractured.|- Can it be repaired ?
- Computer, can it be repaired ?|- Damage to beryllium sphere:|irreparable.
- New source of beryllium|must be secured.|- We need another one.
You broke the ship.|You broke the bloody ship.
Eh, ah--
Computer, is there a replacement|beryllium sphere on board ?
Computer, is there a replacement|beryllium sphere on board ?
Negative. No reserve|beryllium sphere exists on board.
No, we have no extra|beryllium sphere on board.
You know, that is|really getting annoying.
Look, I have one job|on this lousy ship.
It's stupid,|but I'm gonna do it, okay ?
Sure, no problem.
A thousand apologies.|We have failed you.
How have you failed us ?
We have seen you victorious in|much more desperate situations.
The fault must lie with us,|with the ship.
No, Mathesar, it is not your fault,|and it's not the ship's fault.
It's-lt's-lt's-lt's|my fault.
-We-We screwed--|-We are not the people you think we are.
I don't understand.
Didn't you make any TV shows|on your planet ? Any theater, films ?
The historical documents|of your culture.
Yes, in fact, we have begun to document|our history from your example.
No, not historical documents. They're|not all historical documents. I mean,
surely you don't think|that Gilligan's lsland is a--
- Those poor people.
Oh, brother.
We're screwed.
Is there no one on your planet|who behaves in a way...
that's contrary|to reality ?
You are speaking of--
- Deception, lies.|- Deception, lies.
We have only recently|become aware of this concept|in our dealings with Sarris.
Often, Sarris will say one thing|and do another.
Promise us mercy,|but deliver destruction.
It is a concept we are beginning|to learn at some great costs.
But if you are saying that|any of you could have traits|in common with Sarris--
Hey, Commander, listen. We found|some beryllium on a nearby planet.
We might be able to get there...
if we reconfigure|the solar matrix...
in parallel|for endothermic propulsion.
What do you think ?
- We'll do that !|- All right !
That's-That's-That's|right again.
That's-- C-C-Come on.|Group hug.
- Come on.
Dr. Lazarus, I hope|I am not breaching protocol,
but I am so very humbled|to stand in your presence.
I have studied your missions|extensively.
Though I am Thermian, I have lived|my life by your philosophy,
by the code|of the Mak'tar.
- Oh, good, that's very nice.|- By Grabthar's hammer, Dr. Lazarus.
- Don't do that. I'm not kidding.|- I'm sorry, sir, I was just--
Just don't.
Yes, sir.
Never give up,|never surrender.
Dr. Lazarus ?
Here is your surface mapper. I have|programmed it to the coordinates...
of a beryllium sphere|of sufficient density.
- Good luck on your mission, sir.|- Thanks.
You're doing good,|Tommy.
I changed my mind.|I wanna go back.
After the fuss you made|about getting left behind ?
Yeah, but that's when I thought|I was the crewman...
that stays on the ship, and something|is up there, and it kills me.
But now I'm thinking I'm the guy|who gets killed by some monster...
five minutes after we land|on the planet.
You're not gonna die|on the planet, Guy.
I'm not ?|Then what's my last name ?
It's, uh, uh--|I don't know.
Nobody knows !|Do you know why ?
Because my character isn't|important enough for a last name,
because I'm gonna die|five minutes in.
Guy, you have a last name.
- Do I ? Do I ?|- Yes !
For all you know,|I'm just crewman number six.
Mommy ! Mommy ! Mommy !
Are we there yet ?
- Mommy !|- Tommy !
- Look out ! Oh, no !|- Pull out !
Oh, yeah !
- Don't open that !|It's an alien planet !
Is there air ?|You don't know !
Seems okay.
Here we go.
Which way, Alexander ?
This way !
Wait. No.
- That way.|- You were holding it upside down.
- Shut up.|- You know, with|all that makeup and stuff,
I actually thought|you were smart for a second.
You think you could|do better, Laredo ?
- All right with that Laredo stuff.|- Oh, we're so screwed.
Come on, come on, come on,|if we wanna finish this mission,|we have to use self-control.
"Self-control" ?|That's funny, coming from a guy...
who slept with every Turekian slave|girl and moon princess on the show.
Ever occur to you,|had you been more supportive,|you might've been--
Wow. Must be|some sort of mining facility.
- Where are the miners ?|- Something bad happened here.
- Will you relax ?
There they are.|Beryllium spheres. Let's go.
Look at that.
Would you look at that ?|They look like little children.
Could they be the miners ?
Sure, they're like|three years old.
Miners, not minors.
- You lost me.|- I don't like this.
- I don't like this at all.|- They are so cute.
Sure, they're cute now.|In a second, they're gonna get mean.
They're gonna get ugly somehow, then|there's gonna be a million more of them.
Look.|There's a little hurt one.
Hi.|Hi there.
- Ah !|- Shh !
- Did you guys ever watch the show ?
See ?
They're gonna help|the little hurt one.
I'm so sick|of being right.
- Let's get out of here before|one of those things kills Guy.|- Wait a minute.
We're not going anywhere without|a beryllium sphere. We need a plan.
Fred, I need a diversion|to clear the compound of those things.
Then, Alex and Gwen and I|will go get a sphere.
Tommy, get up on that ridge,|and if you see them come back,|give me a signal, all right ?
Why does this sound|so familiar ?
"Assault on Voltareck 3,"|episode 81.
- We're doing episode 81 ?|- Whatever. The one with|the hologram, the wall of fire.
Well, how the hell is Fred|supposed to project a hologram ?
- What did we do in episode 81 ?|- It's just a rough plan.
- What difference does it make|if it's episode 81 or not ?|- 'Cause I died in episode 81 !
- Shh ! Episode 51, right ?|- This is ludicrous.
Why are you listening to this fellow ?|May I remind you:
He's wearing a costume,|not a uniform.
He's no more equipped to lead us|than this fellow. No offense.
Look, they're gone.
- Where'd they go, back inside ?|- I don't know.
- Nobody was watching.|- All right, all right !
Listen up. Here's the plan.|Gwen, Fred, Alex and l,|we'll go down and get a sphere.
Fleegman, you set up a perimeter,|and Tommy, you're lookout.
- You see anything at all,|you give us a signal.|- What kind of a signal ?
- Any kind of signal.|- Okay, I'll do my hands|like this, and caw, caw !
What are you, an infant ?|Look, we have these.
- That-- Sorry.|- All right, let's go.
- Does rolling help ?|- Uh-huh, it helps.
- Where's your gun ?|- It helps.|- Shoot !
- Oh.|- What ?
Never give up, never surrender.
Oh, shut up.
Run ! Run ! Run !
- They're everywhere,|they're everywhere.|- Everywhere !
- Come on, let's go.|- Let's go !
- Hurry !
They're everywhere.|Come on !
Don't look back. Don't look back.
- We're not gonna make it.
- Oh, God !
- I knew it, I knew it.|I knew this was gonna kill me.|- Hurry ! Go, go, go !
Come on. Push. Let's go. Go !
I got it, but it's gonna|take a few seconds.
I got it, I got it !
- Go ahead.|- There's no time. Get in, get in.
Of course, I forgot, you've got|to be the hero. Haven't you ?
Heaven forbid anybody else gets|the spotlight ! Oh, no, Jason Nesmith--
- Oh ! Jason ! Jason, come on !
- Hurry !|- Tommy, go ! Go ! I mean it !
Help ! No, no, no ! Jason, please !|Tommy, stop the pod, stop it !
- I can't stop it. It's on autopilot.|- Go ! Leave him !
No !
[ Screeching ]
Oh, right !
Of course, it's always|about you, isn't it ?
Oh, hey !
Gorignack, Gorignack.
- Gorignak, Gorignak,|Gorignak, Gorignak.
Jason ? Jason,|can you hear me ?
- Yeah, Gwen, you got me.|- Thank God. Are you okay ?
Yeah. As a matter of fact,|I've got Gorignak staring me|in the face right now.
But you know what ?|I think I can take him.
Jason, we're gonna use the digital|conveyor to get you out of there.
- The digital conveyor ?|- Yeah.
You gonna have me diced into cubes|and sent up there in a million pieces ?
- Right.|- Well, you know what ?
I think I'll take my chances|with Gorignak.
We're getting you out right now.|It's perfectly safe, isn't it, Teb ?
It has never been|successfully tested.
- What did he say ?|- Hold, please.
Theoretically, the mechanism|is fully operational.
However, it was built to accommodate|your anatomy, not ours.
But now that Tech Sergeant Chen|is here, he can operate it.
It was designed watching his motions|from the historical documents.
I-l-l mean, I can't.
- I-l can supervise.|- Jason, we're gonna test it.
- On what ?|- How about that pig lizard ?
- Hey, I'm doing all right|with the pig lizard.|- Please, Fred. And hurry.
I'm sorry. It's very exciting|to watch the master at the controls.
The operation of the conveyor is|much more-- hmm-mmm-- art than science.
Stand back, Jason.
Gorignak, Gorignak,|Gorignak.
- What ? What was that ?|- Uh--|- Nothing.
- I heard some squealing or something.|- Oh, no, everything's fine.
But the animal is|inside out.
I heard that.|It turned inside out ?
And it exploded.
Did I just hear that the animal|turned inside out and exploded ?
Hello ?
Hold, please.
Hey, wait a minute.|Guys, guys.
If the pig lizard is gone,|why are they still yelling "Gorignak."
Teb, hit|the translation circuit.
Gorignak, Gorignak. Rock.
Rock, rock, rock.
- Jason,
I don't think the pig lizard|was Gorignak.
What the hell|you talkin' about ?
Oh, darn.
Digitize me !
- Come on, Fred.|- Come on, guys, digitize me !
- Not me.|- Come on, they based it|on your hand movements.
- Am I the only one who saw|that thing inside out ?|- No, no, no, no.
I-l-l'm not the guy.
I'm not Tech Sergeant Chen.|Kwan's not even my real name.
Fred's no good, Jason.|You're just gonna have to kill it.
Kill it ? Well,|I'm open to any suggestions.
Go for the eyes,|like in episode 22 !
It doesn't have|any eyes, Tommy.
Go for the mouth or throat,|its vulnerable spots !
It's a rock.|It doesn't have any vulnerable spots !
I know ! You construct a weapon.|Look around you.
- Can you form some sort|of rudimentary lathe ?|- A lathe !
Get off the line, Guy ! Alexander,|you're my advisor. Advise me.
Well, you're just gonna have to|figure out what it wants.
What is its motivation ?
It's a rock monster.|It doesn't have motivation.
See, that's your problem, Jason.|You were never serious about the craft.
Oh ! Fred, can you hear me ?
Fred, are you there ?
- Kinda.|- You can do it, Fred. It's up to you.
Oh, no, no, no. Jason,|I'll just-- I'll just mess it up.
You did it for four years|on the show. Do it now.
That was the show.|I'm not that guy.
You never forgot a line.|You never missed a mark.
That's not me anymore, man.
It is you, Fred.|You just stopped trying.
You could do this, Fred. I know|in my heart, you're gonna save my life.
- I am ?|- No doubt about it, Fred.
Fred !
Fred, can you hear me ?
Fred !
Fred ?|I don't wanna die down here.
Digitize me, Fred !
- Oh, wow.|- Oh !
- Tech Sergeant Chen.|- Yeah !
Oh !
I see you managed|to get your shirt off.
- I did it.|- Welcome back, Fred.
All right, did we get|the beryllium sphere installed ?
- Yes, we are back to full power.|- Great. Engines and pods ?
- Fully operational.|- Perfect ! We'll crank this sucker up.
You can drop us off, and you guys can be|back to your home planet before supper.
Oh, no, sir,|we have no reason to go back.
Sure you do.|Family, friends. Come on.
We are all that is left.
- I didn't know that.|- Sir, I have raised the command deck.
Mathesar, meet us up|on the command deck.
Mathesar, Quellek !
Why can't we reach them ?
Thank God, you're alive.
Now you will face justice,|Sarris.
At every turn, you demonstrate|the necessity for your extermination.
Leave him alone.
You wish to save the life|of this man ?
Yeah. Yes.
Then tell me--|what does it do,
- this Omega 13 ?|- I don't know what it does.
I said, I don't know.
- Is it a bomb ?|- I don't know.
- A booby trap ?|- I don't know !
- Tell me !|- I don't know !
- [ Moaning ]|- Do you think I'm a fool ?
That the commander does not know|every bolt, every weld in his ship ?
Prepare a tear harness...
for the female.
- You brute ! Let go of me !
I'm not the commander.
What did you say ?
I said,|I'm not the commander.
Leave them alone.|There's no reason to hurt them.
- They don't know anything.|- Explain.
Gwen, show him|the historical documents.
show the historical documents|of the Galaxy Quest missions.
You have all done far greater damage|than I ever could have.
Bravo !
This is a moment|I will treasure.
Explain to him...
who you all really are.
Tell him !
Explain !
Mathesar, the--
There's no such person|as Captain Taggart.
My name is Jason Nesmith.|I am an actor.
We're all actors.
He doesn't understand.
Explain as you would|a child.
We, uh--|We pretended.
We lied.
- Yes ! You understand that,|don't you, Mathesar ?
Mathesar, l--|I'm not a commander.
There's no National Space|Exploration Administration.
We don't have a ship.
But there it is.
That ship is that big.
But inside,|I see many rooms.
You've seen plywood sets|that look like the inside.
Our beryllium sphere is-is wire|with plaster around it.
And our--
our digital conveyor is...
Christmas tree lights.
It's a decoration.|It's all fake.
Just like me.
But why ?
It's difficult|to explain.
On our planet, we--
we pretend|to-to entertain and--
Mathesar,|I am so sorry.
God, I am so sorry.
- So now you know.
Lieutenant Lathe, hardwire|the reactor core to overload.
I would like to blow|this troublesome vehicle to dust.
- Sarris, what about my people ?|- Yes !
Far too simple|a death for them, isn't it ?
Lathe, open an oxygen seal|on level "C."
Let the air in a bit|for our friends.
Son of a--
Release them...
into space.
Core overload.|Emergency shutdown: overridden.
Core implosion estimated|in nine minutes.
- Core overload.|Emergency shutdown: overridden.|- Hey !
Where's the happy ending, Jason ?
Never give up,|never surrender.
Maybe it's about time you just backed|off, you fin-headed monstrosity.
- Jason ?|- You what ?
You're starting to act|like you did in episode 17,
you scene-stealing hack.
Oh, right.
Well, how does it feel, Jason ?
-Was it worth it ? You murdered us all !|-Shut up.
Hundreds to die|just because of you.
- I told you to shut up.|- Both of you, get in there.
Hundreds to die just because|you wanna play a big commander.
- You raving lunatic.|- Then I'll see you in hell, won't I ?
- Look out, Jason !|- Get his gun ! Get the gun !
Take that !
Sorry, I was-- Door was|a little sticky. Did you see that ?
I'll get one of my boys up here|with a can of WD-40.
- You used to pull your punches.|- Scene-stealing hack, thank you.
- Raving egomaniac.|- Can't think where I got that from.
They're suffocating.
Core overload.|Emergency shutdown: overridden.
Core implosion estimated|in eight minutes.
General, your transport|is ready for departure !
Core overload.|Emergency shutdown: overridden.
Core implosion estimated|in seven minutes.
- Computer, shut down the core.|- Unable.
Memory checks invalid.|Core system's hardware damaged.
All right, listen up, this is what|we gotta do. Gwen, you and l,
we're gonna get to the core|and shut it down manually.
Fred, take Guy and Laliari.|You find that valve.
Shut it off before|those Thermians run out of air.
Alexander, get to the barracks. Wedge|a door open, in case they can't do that.
- Okay.|- Wait, Jason. What about me ?|What do I do ?
You're gonna practice driving.|Let's go !
Practice driving.
- So we get to shut down|a neutron reactor.|- That's right.
I hate to break it|to you, Jason,
but I don't know how to|shut down a neutron reactor,
and unless you took a learning annex|course I don't know about,
I'm pretty sure you don't know how|to shut down a neutron reactor either.
No, I don't,|but I know someone who does.
- Brandon, honey, garbage.
Aw, Mother,|I'm quite busy.
Come on, Brandon,|don't make me ask you again.
Just ten more minutes.|Okay, Ma, I promise.
- Hello ? Anybody there ?
Hello ?
Hello ?
Got him. Listen to me.|This is Jason Nesmith.
I play Commander Peter Quincy Taggart,|N.S.E.A. Protector.
We accidentally traded boxes the other|day when we bumped into each other.
Oh ? Oh.|Commander, I see.
- Okay.|- What's your name, son ?
[ Sighs ]|Brandon.
Brandon, I remember you|from the convention, right ?
You asked all those little|technical questions about the ship,
and I was a little short|with you.
Yes, yes, I know, Commander,|and I actually wanna--
I just wanted to tell you that|l-l thought a lot about what you said.
- It's okay. Listen.|- But I want you to know...
that I'm not a complete|brain case, okay ?
I understand completely|that it's just a TV show.
- H-Hold-- Wait a minute.
Stop for a second.|Stop. Wait. It's all real.
Oh, my God, I knew it.|I knew it ! I knew it !
The crew and I are in a lot of trouble,|and we need your help.
Core overload.|Emergency shutdown: overridden.
Core implosion estimated|in six minutes.
Sir, it's you.|Thank lpthar.
Quellek ?|What are you doing up there ?
I avoided capture by using|your Mak'tar stealth face.
- Where is everyone ?|- Come with me.
I'll explain on the way.
All right, we're at level "C,"|hallway five. Now what ?
Um, go to weapons storage,|your second left, through the passage.
And that leads to a system|of utility corridors|through the bowels of the ship.
- Open.|- You know, I'm gonna get Kyle.
He knows the utility tunnel system|better than anybody alive.
...38, 39, 40.
All we have to do is|turn off the valve to the barracks.
- Hi, Brandon.|- No time for pleasantries, Kyle.
We have a level five emergency.|You still got the utility systems|walk-through, right ?
Yeah, I've got sectors|one through twenty-eight.|Hollister has the upper levels.
Great.|We'll get everybody on-line.
- Pedal to the metal, Commander.|- Pedal to the metal, Commander.
General !|I have just received word...
that the commander of the Protector|and his command crew...
have escaped custody.
What ?
- Find them !|- But sir ! My men--|The core implosion--
Find them !
All right, Brandon, I see five ducts|in this room. Which way do we go ?
Enter the passage|second to your left...
and just continue straight|for 50 meters.
Ducts ?|Why is it always ducts ?
- Ah, there will be a slight drop.
Thanks for the heads-up,|Brandon ! You okay ?
They're dying.
- Wait a minute.|We gotta go across this thing ?|- Yes.
- Don't look down.|- What I'd give to see|what you're seeing.
- What are you talking about ?|- You're deep in the underbelly|of the Omega 13 !
Oh, it must be spectacular.
It-lt doesn't look|like much to me.
There's just these few walls|and this dumb spinning fan|that we have in every single--
Brandon, what does|the Omega 13 device do ?
Uh, many have believed|that it is a matter collapser.
A bomb capable of destroying pretty much|everything in about 13 seconds.
- But myself and others are convinced|that what it is...|- I'm gonna go. Go.
is a matter rearranger,
affecting a 13-second time jump|to the past.
Why 13 seconds ?|That's really not enough time|to do anything of any importance.
- It'd be time to redeem|a single mistake.|- What ?
- Go, go, go, go !
We-We gotta turn off that valve.|Their oxygen's almost gone.
Listen.|I'll go in.
I'll create a distraction.|I've got this. I'm okay.
I'm gonna be able to hold him back|long enough for the aliens to escape.
- That's suicide.|- I'm just a glorified extra, Fred.
I'm a dead man anyway. If I'm gonna die,|I'd rather go out a hero than a coward.
Guy, Guy, maybe you're|the plucky comic relief.
You ever think|about that ?
- Plucky ?|- Oh, besides,
I just had this|really interesting idea.
Are you stoned ?
Gotta get her up|and give them some time.
- Sir, perhaps together--
the Mak'tar chant of strength:|Larak tarath.
- Larak tarath, larak tarath.|- Larak tarath.
[ Together ] Larak tarath, larak tarath,|larak tarath, larack tarath.
All right, Brandon, we're across.|Now what ?
You wanna take a left and then just|straight on through the chompers.
"The chompers" ?
- Well, screw that.|- How are we supposed|to get through this ?
Hollister, do you have|the sequence yet ?
Okay, the sequence is...
What is this thing ?|I mean, it serves no useful purpose...
for there to be a bunch|of chompy, crushy things|in the middle of a hallway !
We shouldn't have to do this.|It makes no sense ! Why is it here ?
- 'Cause it's on the television show.|- Well, forget it !
I am not doing it !|This episode was badly written !
Okay, Commander, now, as soon|as the first crusher hits you--
- It just did !
- Okay, go now.|- Go !
Go ! Stop !
Go !|Wait a minute.
Come on,|come on, come on.
Go ! Go !
Go ! Go !
- Go !|- Stop, stop. Go !
- Stop !
Jump, Commander, jump !
Whoever wrote this episode|should die !
This should be interesting.
It's the simple things in life|you treasure.
That's great.
Now, we better get--
Get a room, guys.
Whoa !
Hey, Fred.
Hey, Fred, uh--
Oh, that's not right.|Oh !
Sir, the pressure--|it's normalizing.
All right !
We are saved.
He has saved us.
Commander Taggart|has saved us !
It's just not fair.
All right, Quellek,|let's get back to the commander.
[ Laser Blast ]
I'm-l'm shot.
- Quellek ?
That's not too bad.
We'll get you to the medical quarters,|and you'll be fine.
It has been my greatest honor|to serve with you.
I have been blessed, sir.|I-l--
Don't speak, Quellek.
You'll forgive|my impertinence, sir,
but even though|we had never before met,
I always considered you|as a father to me.
By Grabthar's hammer,
by the sons of Warvan,
you shall be avenged.
...13, 14, 15, 16,|17, 18, 19 !
- All right, Brandon,|how do we shut this thing down ?|- Okay, just push the blue button.
- The blue button-- is that it ?|- Yeah, why ? What's wrong ?
Nothing. I just thought it'd be|more complicated than that.
Core implosion estimated|in 20 seconds.
Brandon, it's not working.|Brandon !
Mother, I cannot stress enough|the severity...
- of the commander's predicament.|- Don't forget the recyclables !
Core implosion estimated|in ten seconds.
- Nine, eight,|- Gwen, l--
- seven, six,|- I've always--
- five, four,|- Jason, oh, Jason.
three, two, one.
- It always stops at one on the show.
Um, what were you saying ?
- Sir !|- What ?
The core detonation sequence|on the Protector has been aborted.
Impossible !|lmpossible !
Lock a complement of implosion missiles|under the Protector.
Tear her apart.
He's finished. Alexander,|listen to me. It's okay, it's okay.
The Thermians can handle it from here.|We gotta go. Come on.
We need that armor|back up !
- Get me a forward view right now !|- Plasma armor: engaged.
- All right, Tommy, see if you can|lose 'em in that mine field.
- M-Mine field ?|- Pedal to the medal, right now !
- Pedal to the medal !|- All right, let's go !
Good going, Tommy.|Great going.
Thrust ahead-- full !
Into the field !|Go !
- Tommy, can you get us closer|to these mines ?|- Closer ?
I could try.
General,|I've lost them.
The magnetism of the mine field|is disrupting our instruments.
Wait !|I see something.
Yes. Yes !|There they are.
- Get back on their tail.|- I can't, sir.
- What ? Why not ?|- Because they're coming right at us.
Fire at will.
Whoo ! We're getting hammered,|Jason ! Return fire ?
No ! Divert all energy|to the armor !
How adorable--
the actors are going|to play war with me.
- Sarris' ship, accelerating|toward us at mark 2.|- Accelerate to mark 4.
Let me remind you, sonny:
I am a general.
If you are counting on me|to blink,
then you are making|a deadly mistake.
Well, let me tell you|something, Sarris.
It doesn't take a great actor to|recognize a bad one. You're sweating.
Armor almost gone, Jason !
You fool ! You failed to realize|that with your armor gone,
my ship will tear through yours|like tissue paper.
And what you fail to realize is|my ship is dragging mines.
Oh, no !|Turn, turn !
- We did it !
Yes ! Yes !
- Yes !
Yes ! Yes !
- Mathesar !
- Oh, my God, you're alive.
- Come here.|- The ship was a model as big as this.
A very clever|deception indeed.
Set a course|for home, Commander ?
- Can you do that ?|- Oh, yeah, just point and click.
- But we're gonna have to go|through the black hole.|- Any objections ?
All right, set her up.
What's the matter,|Mathesar ?
We were hoping|you could come with us.
M-My people|have no commander.
Mathesar, I think your people...
have a great commander.
All right, Tommy,|take us into the black hole.
- We're out !|- We're going home.
- Systems register functional.|- All systems are working, Commander.
Jason, before the black hole, there was|an energy surge from Sarris' ship.
Let's not worry about that|right now, Alexander.|Fred, what are you doing up here ?
Shouldn't you be downstairs|until we dec-- Hey, you can put|an eye out with that thing.
Fred ?
No !
Mathesar ! Activate|the Omega 13 !
- We're out !|- We're going home !
Systems register functional.
All systems are working,|Commander.
Jason, before the black hole, there was|an energy surge from Sarris' ship.
Jason, what are you doing ?|What are you doing ?
Let go of me. Let--|It's not Fred.
That's Sarris. Listen to me.|I'm telling you, that's not Fred,|that's Sarris.
He's gonna try to kill|all of us.
Never give up,|never surrender.
Jason. Jason !|I can't slow it down !
Our ship is too big|to enter the atmosphere.
We need to separate,|or we'll die.
We gotta do it.|It's our only hope, Mathesar.
Thank you.
Crew to|the secondary deck.
Mathesar !
Good-bye, my friends.
Fred, get up to command deck.|We're separating.
On, Teb, on !
This is the third day|of the Galaxy Con,
and Jason Nesmith and his entire crew|are no-shows here at the big event,
much to the disappointment|of all these fans, knows as Questoids.
- Bye. Be back soon.|- Wait a minute. Where you going|with those fireworks ?
Well, the Protector|got super accelerated|coming out of the black hole,
and it nailed the atmosphere|at mark 15,
which, you guys know,|is pretty unstable obviously,
so we're gonna help Laredo guide it|on the vox ultra-frequency carrier...
and use Roman candles|for visual confirmation.
A-All right,|dinner's at 7:00.
- Well, he's outside.|- Hmm.
Lieutenant Laredo--|Tommy Webber !
Hi, Tommy !
The beautiful Tawny Madison--|Gwen DeMarco !
Yes ! Yes !
Wow, what effects !
Another shipmate !|Yes, the more, the merrier !
The ship's Tech Sergeant Chen,|Fred Kwan, and a friend.
Dr. Lazarus--|Alexander Dane !
Give a big hand.|He's British !
Yes, sir !
Commander Peter Quincy Taggart--|Jason Nesmith !
Great driving, Tommy.
Yeah ! Yes !
Quick, quick, quick.
Mr. Jason Nesmith !
Come on, give it up for the crew,|the N.S.E.A. Protector !
Ah, true love !|Yes !
Wow !
They're here for you folks.|Give it up !
What a show !
What a show ! Yes !
Yes ! Yes !
Come on, give it up !|Give it all up...
for the crew of your favorite show,|Galaxy Quest !
Wow !
Come on, come on !
Don't forget to buy Galaxy Quest|T-shirts on your way out.
Thank you.
Whoo !
And now,|back again after 18 years,
the New Adventures of Galaxy Quest.
Never give up, never surrender.
GI Joe Valor Vs Venom CD1
GI Joe Valor Vs Venom CD2
G I Jane 01
G I Jane 02
G I Joe (A valor vs venom) CD1
G I Joe (A valor vs venom) CD2
Galaxy Quest
Gam Gai (2002)
Game The
Game of Death 1978
Gamera daikaij kuchu kessen
Gandhi CD1
Gandhi CD2
Gang Related
Gangs Of New York (2002)
Gangster Number One
Garage Days
Garage Olimpo (1999)
Garden Of Heaven (2003)
Garden State
Gardens Of Stone
Gardens Of Stone 1987 25fps
Garfield the movie
Gas Food Lodging 1992
Gaslight 1940
Gate Keeper ep1
Gate Keeper ep2
Gathering Storm The
Gattaca (1997) CD1
Gattaca (1997) CD2
Gauyat Sandiu Haplui - Saviour of the Soul
Gaz Bar Blues CD1
Gaz Bar Blues CD2
Geboren In Absurdistan
Geisha A 1953
Geisha House The CD1
Geisha House The CD2
Gendai Yakuza (Kinji Fukasaku 1972)
Gendarme a New York Le
General The
Generals Daughter The
Generation X Cops
Genroku Chushingura 1941 CD1
Genroku Chushingura 1941 CD2
Gentlemans Agreement (Elia Kazan 1947) CD1
Gentlemans Agreement (Elia Kazan 1947) CD2
Gentlemen Prefer Blondes
George Washington
George of the Jungle 2 2003
Gertrud CD1
Gertrud CD2
Get Carter 1971
Get Carter 2000
Get Real
Get Shorty
Getaway The 1972
Getting Any (Takeshi Kitano)
Geung si sin sang (1985) - Mr Vampire 23976fps
Ggot Seom (Flower Island)
Ghost Busters
Ghost Dog - The Way of the Samurai
Ghost In The Shell 2 - Innocence 2004
Ghost Ship
Ghost World
Ghost and the Darkness The
Ghost in the shell
Ghost of Kasane 1957
Ghostbusters 2
Ghosts Of Edendale The 2003
Ghosts Of Mars
Ghoul The
Ghoulies II
Giardino dei Finzi-Contini 1970
Gift The 2000
Gigi 1958
Ginger Snaps 2 Unleashed
Ginger Snaps Back 2004
Ginger and Cinnamon - Dillo con parole mie
Ginger e Fred - Fellini (1986) CD1
Ginger e Fred - Fellini (1986) CD2
Gioconda La
Girl Interrupted UK 25 FPS
Girl Next Door
Girl from Wilko The (Andrzej Wajda 1979) CD1
Girl from Wilko The (Andrzej Wajda 1979) CD2
Girl on the Bridge The
Gladiator 2000
Gleaners and I The
Glengarry Glen Ross CD1
Glengarry Glen Ross CD2
Gloire de mon pere La (1990 aka My Fathers Glory)
Gloomy Sunday
Gloria CD1
Gloria CD2
Go-Con! Japanese Love Culture 2000
Go 2001 Isao Yukisada - Keymaker CD1
Go 2001 Isao Yukisada - Keymaker CD2
Goalkeeper The (2000)
God Of Cookery The
God of gamblers 1989 CD1
God of gamblers 1989 CD2
Godfather 2 The
Godfather 3 The
Godfather The
Godfather The Part 1 CD1
Godfather The Part 1 CD2
Godfather The Part 2 CD1
Godfather The Part 2 CD2
Godfather part 3
Godfathers Of Mondo The 2003
Gods Must Be Crazy The 1980
Gods and Generals CD1
Gods and Generals CD2
Godzilla Mothra and King Ghidorah 2001
Godzilla against mechagodzilla
Gohatto 1999
Going My Way CD1
Going My Way CD2
Gold Rush
Golden Child The CD1
Golden Child The CD2
Golden Voyage Of Sinbad The
Gone in 60 Seconds
Gone with the Wind 1939
Gone with the Wind CD1
Gone with the Wind CD3
Gone with the Wind CD4
Good Advice
Good Boy
Good Boy 2003
Good Cop The
Good Earth The - Victor Fleming 1937 CD1
Good Earth The - Victor Fleming 1937 CD2
Good Morning Vietnam
Good Son The
Good Thief The (2002)
Good Work (1999)
Good bye Lenin 2003
Good the Bad and the Ugly The
Goodbye Girl The
Goodbye Mr Chips (1939)
Gospel of John CD1
Gospel of John CD2
Gothika 2003
Gotter der Pest 1970
Goutes d eau sur pierres brulantes 1999
Goya - Carlos Saura 1999
Goyokin - The gold of the Shogun 1969
Gozu (23976fps)
Graduation Day
Gran Vida La - (Living It Up) 2000
Grand Restaurant Le 1966
Grande Illusion La
Grande Strada Azzurra La) CD1
Grande Strada Azzurra La) CD2
Grapes of Death The
Grapes of Wrath The CD1
Grapes of Wrath The CD2
Grave Of The Fireflies CD1
Grave Of The Fireflies CD2
Graveyard Of Honour
Grease 1978 CD1
Grease 1978 CD2
Grease 2
Great Dictator The CD1
Great Dictator The CD2
Great Escape The (1963) CD1
Great Escape The (1963) CD2
Great Expectations 1998
Great Gatsby The (Jack Clayton 1974)
Great Race The
Great Silence The
Great White Hope The 1970
Great Ziegfeld The CD1
Great Ziegfeld The CD2
Green Card
Green Dragon 2001
Green Fish (1997) CD1
Green Fish (1997) CD2
Green Mile The
Gregorys Girl
Gremlins 2 The New Batch CD1
Gremlins 2 The New Batch CD2
Grey Gardens (1975)
Grey Zone The
Greystoke The Legend of Tanzan CD1
Greystoke The Legend of Tanzan CD2
Grifters The
Grinch The - Jim Carrey
Grind 2003
Gronne Slagtere De 2003
Grosse Pointe Blank (1997) CD1
Grosse Pointe Blank (1997) CD2
Groundhog Day
Grudge The
Grudge The CD1
Grudge The CD2
Guadalcanal Diary
Guarding Tess 1994
Guess Whos Coming To Dinner CD1
Guess Whos Coming To Dinner CD2
Guest House Paradiso
Guilty As Sin 1993 25fps
Guilty By Association 2003
Guilty By Suspicion (2003)
Guinevere 1999
Gullivers Travels 1939
Gun Crazy - A Woman From Nowhere
Gun Crazy Vol 2 Beyond the Law
Gunfight at the O K Corral 1957 CD1
Gunfight at the O K Corral 1957 CD2
Gung Ho
Guns And Talks CD1
Guns And Talks CD2
Guns Of Navarone The
Guru The
Guts Of A Beauty (1986)
Guy Thing A
Guys And Dolls
Guys The
Gypsy (Mervyn LeRoy 1962) CD1
Gypsy (Mervyn LeRoy 1962) CD2