Futurama 4x13 - Bend Her
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MALE ANNOUNCER: Welcome to the games of the 3004 Earth Olympiad!
Continuing this network's tradition of sportscasting excellence.
Celebrity Ape Fight will return next week at its regular time.
Who should I root for? America?
Or a country I learned about at the food court?
How about those guys?
LEELA: No. They're from the Republic of French Stereotypes.
Everybody hates them.
Oh. Let's go check on Hermes.
All this inspiring multiculturalism is angrying up my blood!
Sweden? I don't think so.
Go on, stick, touch me. Can't do it.
Husband! You haven't been an Olympic-class limbo-er for 20 years!
Quit lying to your pudgy self.
It seems like Jamaica would be able to field a strong limbo team without you.
Yeah. Isn't that basically all Jamaicans do?
Jamaicans have other interests!
Which is why the limbo team got detained at the airport.
That's when they begged my husband to step in and make an ass out of himself.
And I said I'd try my very best.
But have they seen your, you know, physique since the old days?
I described it to them on the phone using a series of artful euphemisms.
Don't worry. The fat pig will do fine. . .
. . .thanks to this Flabbo-Dynamic Spandex Body Suit I've designed.
It redistributes his weight, shifting his center of gravity closer to his knees.
Ooh, that's snug. Oh!
-Those haven't descended in years! -Now, that's a limbo-er's body!
Look at that fine Jamaican bacon!
Shut up, Zoidberg! The robot bending events are starting.
Something tells me I could easily beat those trained professionals.
Wow! That guy must be, like, the world's greatest bender!
My dreams of glory died before they began.
Welcome to my life.
FEMALE ANNOUNCER: Athletes, please take your lanes...
...for the Men 's 500 Meter Limbo.
Hermes Conrad, is that you inside that dumpy little fat man?
Barbados Slim! What are you doing here?
-Last time I heard, you were in Barbados. -Yes, and I'll be going back there. . .
. . .with a gold medal draped around my elegant Caribbean shoulders.
Your body may be as perfectly sculpted as it was 20 years ago. . .
. . .when you whupped my fat ass every time.
But today, I feel lucky.
I see you're still able to limbo under the bar of fashion sense.
That's it, Barbados Slim! You've gone one toke over the line!
Limbo-ers, on your marks.
Get rubbery. Limbo!
MALE ANNOUNCER: There they go! And Barbados Slim takes an early lead.
God, I hope he wins.
What's this? Hermes Conrad is closing the gap.
He's limboed out of retirement and straight into my heart.
I say, "Go to hell, Barbados Slim!"
-Go, body suit! Go! -Come on!
Come on, Hermes! Beat that mahogany god!
MALE ANNOUNCER: It's Barbados, then Conrad.
Conrad pulls ahead.
And Conrad is disqualified!
Barbados Slim, my hero, takes the gold!
Oh, there, there, Hermes. You did your best.
If I'd wanted a human adonis for a husband. . .
. . .I'd have stayed married to Barbados Slim.
Well, enough about Hermes. I couldn't win a medal either.
Even at bending, the thing I was built to do.
I'm so embarrassed. I wish everybody else was dead.
FEMALE ANNOUNCER: Up next, the Fem-bot Bending Competition.
Methinks a clever man-bot, suitably disguised. . .
. . .might win those events.
But the charade would require subtlety, nuance, grace.
What do you mean I'm not registered?
My name is Coilette, and I'm from Robonia.
-Coilette's a chick's name. -Yes.
But "Robonia" sounds like something somebody made up on the spot.
Ever been beaten up by a guy dressed like a chick?
MALE ANNOUNCER: And it's straight! Coilette wins!
Another gold medal for the spunky maid from Robonia!
A perfect bend and a flawless entry. No splash at all!
Perfect scores! A record five gold medals for Coilette!
I'm great! Everybody else sucks!
Except that guy Bender. He's really something.
FEMALE ANNOUNCER: All medalists report for gender testing.
You actually thought they'd let you walk away without an engine-oil sex check?
Oh, God! I'm not gonna get my medals!
They're all I have to remember my Olympic career!
Wait! I've got it!
-Professor, make a woman out of me! -Oh, I think we should just stay friends.
I don't need friends! I need a sex-change operation, and give it to me now!
Bender, a robot sex change is a complex and dangerous procedure.
Replacing your testoster-oil with fem-bot lubricants. . .
. . .can cause wild mood swings. And the effects may be irreversible.
-Well, let's get started. -No! You can't!
If you have even the slightest respect for the dignity of women--
I'm sorry, ladies, but I must do this. Not for you. Not for Bender.
But for the proud people of Robonia!
Come on. Come on. Come on.
I can't watch this 'cause it's creepy and wrong and sick.
-However, I will watch out of curiosity. -Quiet!
I'm about to begin the process of reshaping Bender's body. . .
. . .into a tender, delicate form.
BENDER: Ow! Ow! Ow! Oh! Hey!
Draining male oil.
Infusing female oil.
We can't wait for Coilette any longer!
I have to get home to watch The Zombie Osbournes.
BENDER IN FEMALE VOICE: I'm ready for my test now, boys.
Hail, hail Robonia
A land I didn 't make up
Yeah, come on, baby. Take that. Goodness.
Oh, yeah, baby. Come on. Work your cans. Now, shake it out.
I don't know which I'm more: enraged or disgusted.
I'm just out there making us ladies look good.
Snuh-uh. You're making us look like jerks in front of the other genders!
-You're not really a lady anyway, right? -Of course not.
Dear Lord, a coaster!
The Femmzoil must be sashaying girlishly into your processor.
Then change me back. My breasts are keeping me awake at night anyway.
[PHONE RINGS] Ooh-ooh!
A guest spot on Late Night With Humorbot 5. 0?
I'd love to! My own limo?
No, I don't have my own limo. You'd better send one.
I need a rain check on that nad swap, professor.
I'm going on TV. Come on, Fry. Help me pick out a pantsuit.
So, Calculon, do you want to set up this clip from All My Circuits?
No, I think it's self-explanatory.
Funny story. The script called for me to say "yes. "
-But I gave it a little twist. -Anecdote accepted.
Snappy comeback not found.
Please put your hands together for my next guest. . .
. . .winner of five Olympic medals, Coilette from Robonia.
So, Coilette, many young fem-bots wish to emulate you.
-Any advice for them? -Yes, Humorbot.
If you ask me, women today are too stuck-up. . .
. . .to go out and jiggle their Jell-O like everybody wants them to.
In fact, should I do it now?
Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!
All right, then.
Look out, baby! Good. Work it out. Oh, shake that thing.
You got to use it, lady. Shake it up a little.
That's right. Come on. Work it out.
Madam, I am one impressed celebrity.
Oh, I bet you say that to all the five- Olympic-gold-medal-winning fem-bots.
From this day forth, I shall do so whenever possible.
-Coilette, this may be presumptuous. . . -That's my favorite kind of "this. "
. . .but I would be honored if you would join me for dinner sometime.
Woo. . . .
Calculon, you'd be fulfilling this naive Robonian farm girl's fantasy.
Of course I would.
This top makes me look fat. Is it trampy to go on a first date nude?
You've gotta tell me. You're not actually attracted to Calculon, right?
-And if you are, don't tell me. Are you? -Certainly not.
But just once I'd like to eat dinner with a celebrity who isn't bound and gagged.
Is that so much to ask?
I think you dating a man-bot is a disgrace.
And I refuse to be involved. And you have way too much lipstick on.
Are you kidding? I need more lipstick! Much more!
Yeah, that's the stuff. Men love it when you really glob it on.
-No, they don't! -No way!
Oh, please! Every man wants a tramp.
No wonder you girls aren't married.
I tell you, men are so much better at being women.
But what if he wants to--? I mean, if he tries to--?
I'll tell him I need a commitment first. That'll stick a potato in his tailpipe.
Good Lord, man! What kind of temporary woman are you?
Look, why don't all of you just back off?
Can't a girl enjoy herself without being judged?
Oh, dear! Her mood swings are getting wilder.
She's becoming a slave to her emotions. Just like all women.
Particularly you, Leela.
I'm worried about him too, professor.
Hey, ma'am, you sure can put it away. You saved me a trip to the dump. Bam!
I'd appreciate it if you didn't "bam" the young lady.
Well, I'd appreciate it if I did, so I guess we're even.
You know, Coilette, I've never before met a woman as fascinating as I am.
You're such a sweet, soft fem-bot, yet you have this free spirit about you.
And there it is. It's as if you understand the male mind better than l.
-I've never met anyone like you. -Oh, yes, you have.
Coilette, I'd like to spend some quality time with you.
What? Oh, no way! Not gonna happen! What kind of girl do you think I am?
Have I mentioned that I own the world's biggest and most elegant yacht?
[TOM JONES' "SHE'S A LADY" PLAYS]
Whoo! I'm a trophy girlfriend!
No kidding. These gifts have been coming nonstop.
I think Calculon's falling for you.
Ah, any day now he'll dump me for a new wad of arm candy.
And then I can turn back into a guy and hock all this stuff. It's just a game.
Coilette, I can't stop thinking about you. I can't sleep at night!
Although, as a robot, I don't do that anyway.
But if I did, I couldn't because I love you so.
Oh, my darling.
Will you marry me?
Oh, Calculon. Yes, I will!
Maybe she's right about the lipstick.
I'll miss you. You've been like a brother and then a sister to me.
And now you're getting married. I love you, man.
-The marriage is a scam. -Cool. What's for dinner?
-What do you mean, a scam? -I marry Calculon, divorce him. . .
. . .take half his money and turn back into a guy.
It's sort of a two-person pyramid scheme.
-That's marriage, all right. -That is so unbelievably manipulative!
You never went on a date with a guy just 'cause you were hungry?
I, uh. . . . I thought I might like him on a full stomach.
Nice try, sister.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to meet with my wedding planner.
Zoidy-Poo? Please tell me frilly is in this year.
I saw a frilly cake in here you would remember all your life.
I know I will.
Late at night it taunts me with its frosted beauty.
Order the cake, damn it!
I have something for you.
A remote control? You got me a TV?
No, my dearest. It's the remote control to my heart.
It symbolizes the power you have to sway my emotions.
-Will it work on my TV? -We don't need TVs.
We have each other.
Coilette, if I weren't able to spend my life with you. . .
. . .I would leap from this very balloon.
-Come on with that. Really? -Yes.
We were meant to be.
So you really and truly love me?
So much so that I'm prepared to give up show business itself to be with you.
But you always said you'd rather burn down a convent. . .
-. . .than give up show business. -I always said many things.
But now all I want is a peaceful life in a quiet villa overlooking a vineyard. . .
. . .with you.
-Would we have donkeys? -All you could eat.
Oh, take me in your arms and compress me! Compress me tight!
Stop! Let us climb to the heavens. . .
. . .that the gods themselves might envy us!
I just don't think I can go through with this scam.
-What? -So now you do want to marry him?
No. I just don't want to hurt him or humiliate him.
Oh, curse this woman's heart!
You're falling into the final debilitating stages of womanhood!
You've waited too long to switch back, you dingbat!
Okay, look, if I help you with this. . .
. . .do you promise to get out of my gender and stay out?
All right. Now, there's no way to stop this marriage without hurting Calculon.
But he's an actor. If there's one kind of pain he can handle. . .
. . .it's soap opera pain.
[CHURCH BELL RINGS]
-Okay, is everyone ready? -Yep!
Dearly beloved actors and casting people. . .
. . .who might be looking for someone to play a preacher. . .
. . .I welcome you!
The bride has written some vows. . .
. . .that we will now all pretend to be interested in.
Dearest Calculon, forever is not enough time. . .
. . .to tell you of the many ways I love you.
[GROANS] [PEOPLE GASPING]
-Oh, my! -Is there a doctor in--?
I came as soon as I could.
Oh, it appears to be a case of African hydraulic fever!
Dear God! The very illness my TV character caught in season two. . .
. . .when I was holding out for more money. It's often fatal.
Whatever happens, remember:
The flame of my eternal love will burn forever.
Of course. But, smoochy-pops, I thought one could only catch hydraulic fever. . .
. . .deep in the diamond mines of the Congo.
LEELA: Coilette! You she-devil!
You really thought you could steal those diamonds from me and Congo Jack?
Those gems belong to the natives!
Oh, how cruel and melodramatic fate is!
Calculon, my darling, your loud "why" brought me partway back to life.
-Congo Jack! -Another shocking twist!
Yes! And I have a message for you from Col. Matombay.
He says, "This is from Congo Jack. "
Uh, um. . . .
I won't leave you.
Not until I'm sure you understand the thing I said before. . .
. . .about my eternal love for you burning.
-Et cetera. -I do.
-I do. -Okay, then.
I'm a doctor. She's dead.
She lives no more.
But let us all find comfort, knowing that she truly loved me.
To honor my pain, I shall star in a film dedicated to her memory.
And this time, the Academy will not deny me.
Not when they see Coilette: The Calculon Story.
Coilette, your death fills me with sorrow, anger, fear.
Every emotion an actor can display.
Turn off that crap-o-rama!
One mistake and Bender will be trapped forever. . .
. . .between the already ill-defined robot sexes.
Ow! Ooh! Ow! Ah!
I hope this taught you a lesson about changing your sex to win gold medals.
It truly has.
My romance with Calculon has shown me a lot about myself.
-Almost done. -If only somehow, some way. . .
IN MALE VOICE: . . .he and I could drive to Vegas, pick up some floozy-bots. . .
. . .and void their warranties all night long! Whoo!
Yay! My buddy's home! And his respect for women is back to normal.
I hoped this experience would have left you more open to your sensitive side.
Yeah, you'd think, but what you gonna do?
Coilette, the skies themselves weep...
...upon the sweetest flower of all the field.
-Sentimental dribble poop! -Come on, Bender, let's go.
-This chick flick is getting me all barfy. -Yeah.
Emotions are dumb and should be hated.
Good night forever, my turtledove.
-Good night, Calculon. -What did you say?
I said, "You two don't dress trampy enough! "
I still got it.
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Friends - 3 22 - The One With the Screamer
Friends - 3x01 - The One With the Princess Leia Fantasy
Friends - 3x02 - The One Where No Ones Ready
Friends - 3x03 - The One With the Jam
Friends - 3x04 - The One With the Metaphorical Tunnel
Friends - 3x05 - The One With Frank Jr
Friends - 3x06 - The One With the Flashback
Friends - 3x07 - The One With the Race Car Bed
Friends - 3x08 - The One With the Giant Poking Device
Friends - 3x09 - The One With the Football
Friends - 3x10 - The One Where Rachel Quits
Friends - 3x11 - The One Where Chandler Cant Remember
Friends - 3x12 - The One With All the Jealousy
Friends - 3x13 - The One Where Monica and Richard
Friends - 3x14 - The One With Phoebes Ex-Partner
Friends - 3x15 - The One Where Ross and Rachel Take
Friends - 3x16 - The One the Morning After
Friends - 3x17 - The One Without the Ski Trip
Friends - 3x18 - The One With the Hypnosis Tape
Friends - 3x19 - The One With the Tiny T-Shirt
Friends - 3x20 - The One With the Dollhouse
Friends - 3x21 - The One With a Chick and a Duck
Friends - 3x22 - The One With the Screamer
Friends - 3x23 - The One With Rosss Thing
Friends - 3x24 - The One With Ultimate Fighting Champ
Friends - 3x25 - The One at the Beach
Friends - 4x01 - The One With the Jellyfish
Friends - 4x02 - The One With the Cat
Friends - 4x03 - The One With the Cuffs
Friends - 4x04 - The One With the Ballroom Dancing
Friends - 4x05 - The One With Joeys New Girlfriend
Friends - 4x06 - The One With the Dirty Girl
Friends - 4x07 - The One Where Chandler Crosses
Friends - 4x08 - The One With Chandler in a Box
Friends - 4x09 - The One Where They are Going
Friends - 4x10 - The One With the Girl from
Friends - 4x11 - The One With Phoebes Uterus
Friends - 4x12 - The One With the Embryos
Friends - 4x13 - The One With Rachels Crush
Friends - 4x14 - The One With Joeys Dirty Day
Friends - 4x15 - The One With All the Rugby
Friends - 4x16 - The One With the Fake Party
Friends - 4x17 - The One With the Free Porn
Friends - 4x18 - The One With Rachels New Dress
Friends - 4x19 - The One With All the Haste
Friends - 4x20 - The One With All the Wedding Dresses
Friends - 4x21 - The One With the Invitation
Friends - 4x22 - The One With the Worst Best Man Ever
Friends - 4x23 - The One With Rosss Wedding - part 1
Friends - 4x24 - The One With Rosss Wedding - part 2
Friends - 5x01 - The One After Ross Says Rachel
Friends - 5x02 - The One With All the Kissing
Friends - 5x03 - The One Hundreth
Friends - 5x04 - The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS
Friends - 5x05 - The One With the Kips
Friends - 5x06 - The One With the Yeti
Friends - 5x07 - The One Where Ross Moves In
Friends - 5x08 - The One With All the Thanksgivins
Friends - 5x09 - The One With Rosss Sandwich
Friends - 5x10 - The One With the Inappropiate Sister
Friends - 5x11 - The One With All the Resolutions
Friends - 5x12 - The One With Chandlers Work Laugh
Friends - 5x13 - The One With Joeys Bag
Friends - 5x14 - The One Where Everyone Finds Out
Friends - 5x15 - The One With the Girl Who Hits Joey
Friends - 5x16 - The One With the Cop
Friends - 5x17 - The One With Rachels
Friends - 5x18 - The One Where Rachel Smokes
Friends - 5x19 - The One Where Ross Cant Flirt
Friends - 5x20 - The One With the Ride-Along
Friends - 5x21 - The One With the Ball
Friends - 5x22 - The One With Joeys Big Break
Friends - 5x23 - The One in Vegas
Friends - 6x01 - The One After Vegas
Friends - 6x02 - The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel
Friends - 6x03 - The One With Rosss Denial
Friends - 6x04 - The One Where Joey Loses His
Friends - 6x05 - The One With Joeys Porsche
Friends - 6x06 - The One On the Last Night
Friends - 6x07 - The One Where Phoebe Runs
Friends - 6x08 - The One With Rosss Teeth
Friends - 6x15
Friends 7x01 - The One with Monicas Thunder
Friends 7x02 - The One With Rachels Book
Friends 7x03 - The One With Phoebes Cookies
Friends 7x04 - The One With Rachels Assistant
Friends 7x05 - The One With The Engagement Picture
Friends 7x06 - The One With The Nap Partners
Friends 7x07 - The One with Rosss Library Book
Friends 7x08 - The One Where Chandler Doesnt Like Dogs
Friends 7x09 - The One With All the Candy
Friends 7x10 - The One With The Holiday Armadillo
Friends 7x11 - The One With All The Cheesecakes
Friends 7x12 - The One Where They are Up All Night
Friends 7x13 - The One Where Rosita Dies
Friends 7x14 - The One Where They All Turn Thirty
Friends 7x15 - The One With Joeys New Brain
Friends 7x16 - The One With the Truth About London
Friends 7x17 - The One With the Cheap Wedding Dress
Friends 7x18 - The One With Joeys Award
Friends 7x19 - The One With Ross and Monicas Cousin
Friends 7x20 - The One With Rachels Kisses
Friends 7x21 - The One With the Vows
Friends 7x22 - The One With Chandlers Dad
Friends 7x23 - The One With Monica and Chandlers Wedding Part 1
Friends 7x24 - The One With Monica and Chandlers Wedding Part 2
Friends 9x01 - The One Where No One Proposes
Friends 9x02 - The One Where Emma Cries
Friends 9x03 - The One With The Pediatrician
Friends 9x04 - The One With The Sharks
Friends 9x05 - The One With Phoebes Birthday Dinner
Friends 9x06 - The One With The Male Nanny
Friends 9x07 - The One With Rosss Inappropriate Song
Friends 9x08 - The One With Rachels Other Sister
Friends 9x09 - The One With Rachels Phone Number
Friends 9x10 - The One With Christmas In Tulsa
Friends 9x11 - The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work
Friends 9x12 - The One With Phoebes Rats
Friends 9x13 - The One Where Monica Sings
Friends 9x14 - The One With The Blind Dates
Friends 9x15 - The One With The Mugging
Friends 9x16 - The One With The Boob Job
Friends 9x17 - The One With The Memorial Service
Friends 9x18 - The One With The Lottery
Friends 9x19 - The One With Rachels Dream
Friends 9x20 - The One With The Soap Opera Party
Friends 9x21 - The One With The Fertility Test
Friends 9x22 - The One With The Donor
Friends 9x23-24 - The One In Barbados 1 2)
Frisson des vampires Le
From Beijing with love
From Dusk Till Dawn
From Dusk Till Dawn 3 The Hangmans Daughter
From Justin To Kelly (Special Edition)
Frusta e il corpo La
Fudoh The New Generation 1996
Fugitive The - The Chase Continues
Fukssvansen (Chop Chop)
Full Frontal 2002
Full Metal Jacket
Full Time Killer
Fun Movie (2002 Korean) CD1
Fun Movie (2002 Korean) CD2
Fun in Acapulco (Richard Thorpe 1963)
Funeral Parade of Roses
Funeral in Berlin
Fury The (1978)
Futurama 1x01 - Space Pilot 3000
Futurama 1x02 - The Series Has Landed
Futurama 1x03 - I Roommate
Futurama 1x04 - Loves Labors Lost in Space
Futurama 1x05 - Fear of a Bot Planet
Futurama 1x06 - A Fishful of Dollars
Futurama 1x07 - My Three Suns
Futurama 1x08 - A Big Piece of Garbage
Futurama 1x09 - Hell is Other Robots
Futurama 2x01 - A Flight to Remember
Futurama 2x02 - Mars University
Futurama 2x03 - When Aliens Attack
Futurama 2x04 - Fry and the Slurm Factory
Futurama 3x01 - Amazon Women in the Mood
Futurama 3x02 - Parasites Lost
Futurama 3x03 - A Tale of Two Santas
Futurama 3x04 - The Luck of the Fryrish
Futurama 3x05 - The Birdbot of Ice-catraz
Futurama 3x06 - Bendless Love
Futurama 3x07 - The Day the Earth Stood Stupid
Futurama 3x08 - Thats Lobstertainment
Futurama 3x09 - The Cyber House Rules
Futurama 3x10 - Insane in the Mainframe
Futurama 3x10 - Where The Buggalo Roam
Futurama 3x12 - The Route of All Evil
Futurama 3x13 - Bendin in the Wind
Futurama 3x14 - Time Keeps on Slippin
Futurama 3x15 - I Dated a Robot
Futurama 3x16 - A Leela of Her Own
Futurama 3x17 - A Pharaoh To Remember
Futurama 3x18 - Anthology of Interest Part 2
Futurama 3x19 - Roswell That Ends Well
Futurama 3x20 - Godfellas
Futurama 3x21 - Future Stock
Futurama 3x22 - The 30 Iron Chef
Futurama 4x01 - Kif Gets Knocked Up a Notch
Futurama 4x02 - Leelas Homeworld
Futurama 4x03 - Love and Rocket
Futurama 4x04 - Less Than Hero
Futurama 4x05 - A Taste of Freedom
Futurama 4x06 - Bender Should Not Be Allowed on TV
Futurama 4x07 - Jurassic Bark
Futurama 4x08 - Crimes of the Hot
Futurama 4x09 - Teenage Mutant Leelas Hurdles
Futurama 4x10 - The Why of Fry
Futurama 4x11 - Where no Fan Has Gone Before
Futurama 4x12 - The Sting
Futurama 4x13 - Bend Her
Futurama 4x14 - Obsoletely Fabulous
Futurama 4x15 - The Farnsworth Parabox
Futurama 4x16 - Three Hundred Big Boys
Futurama 4x17 - Spanish Fry
Futurama 4x18 - The Devils Hands are Idle Playthings
Fyra Nyanser Av Brunt CD1
Fyra Nyanser Av Brunt CD2