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Frasier 02x23 - The Innkeepers

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ln this critic's opinion, Mickey's Good Time Tavern is anything but.
Dismal decor, perfunctory service,
and cuisine only marginally preferable to hunger.
And finally, on a sadder note,
after 53 years, Orsini's is closing its doors.
Tonight, a sad adieu to the grande dame of Seattle restaurants.
l thought he was the grande dame of Seattle restaurants.
This is Gil Chesterton saying,
''Bon appetit, buon appetito and nifty noshing.''
- Why is Orsini's closing? - The owner wants to sell.
And Orsini's is like wine that's stayed too long in the cellar -
only memories of its former glory.
- Not comping your cheque? - Not for months now.
Orsini's was my favourite restaurant. Ever been?
My typical date's idea of a gourmet evening
is take out, make out and home by Letterman.
- Knock, knock. - Show starts in two minutes.
Look at the John Steinbeck l bought at the rare book fair.
''St Katy The Virgin'', in like-new condition.
She'd have to be, wouldn't she?
lt's a shame more people haven't read it.
- Let's see. - Don't! You'll decrease its value.
A thriving nightspot is closing its doors.
Roz, you're moving.
No, Orsini's is closing.
lt can't be! lt's part of Crane history!
Grandfather took me there for my eighth birthday.
- Thanks, Roz. - Such vivid memories.
Paper hats, singing Happy Birthday,
sending back the veal Prince Orloff.
30 seconds.
Let's go to Orsini's for a glorious farewell dinner.
l'll make reservations. We'll take Dad and Daphne.
- Will Maris join us? - Sadly no.
One Christmas Eve an ltalian soccer team was there.
Maris announced she was in the mood for a goose and tragedy ensued.
Dear God. What has happened to this place?
lt's like running into a movie star you once worshipped,
only time has left her hair brittle, her eyes sunken and dull,
her skin waxy and sallow.
l've got an appetite. How about you, Daph?
Yes, sir. Do you have a reservation?
Yes. The name's Crane. For four.
Table nine seems to be free. Right this way, sir.
- Your waiter will be here in a moment. - Thank you. Here, Daphne.
- Thank you. - Dad, Frasier, isn't that Otto?
My God, l believe it is! Otto is legendary here.
He never writes anything down. He keeps it all in his head. Otto!
Coming up.
Your cheque, sir.
Wrong table. We'd like menus, please.
Sorry. l hate it when we get crowded.
l'm going to the john. Order me a beer.
l thought you might surprise me and order a glass of wine.
l thought you might surprise me and button your yap.
l'd order him the crab cocktail but the irony would be lost on him.
They'll have trouble finding a buyer.
Yes. One old relic whose time has come to be put out of his misery.
Oh, no, Otto, l didn't mean you.
- Your menu, sir. - Thank you.
- Lovely. - Thank you.
- He's in the men's room. - No, Otto!
Leave it here.
Why do Americans always rush to tear things down?
At home, we treasure antiquities. You just bring in bulldozers.
- l agree with Daphne. - l'll try to contain my amazement.
lt's a crime to lose such a landmark.
lt's well-built, good structure.
lt does have good bones. lt's in a good location.
- lf they only had valet parking. - lf they took down those curtains.
Knocked out these pillars.
You know...l've always dreamed of owning a four-star restaurant.
What growing boy hasn't?
- We'd need a new chef. - The chef at Emilio's is unhappy.
Yes! The man's scungili is a cry for help.
Are you thinking what l'm thinking?
l'm picking out china and sandblasting the wine cave.
lt can be hard work - if you don't scald yourself or lop off a finger,
you're gagging at grease fires,
killing rats and brawling with labour racketeers.
Me auntie had a little tearoom.
You're not gonna do a dumb-ass thing like buying this place?
With all respect, we're not neophytes in this field.
- We know food and wine. - We have style, taste and refinement.
But you guys never think about the hard work or the long hours.
To you, owing a restaurant is fancy clothes,
hobnobbing with friends and turning enemies away.
l hadn't even thought about that!
When l was a cop, there was this restaurant.
ln 1 0 years, it changed hands 20 times.
lt was Ling Fung's Lychee Palace, then Tony's Meatball Hutch,
then, A Taste Of Yorkshire - English food.
Big surprise - that lasted about five minutes.
He's right. People lose money in this business
because they pick the wrong name.
But l was thinking about it while Dad was talking.
Maison Crane. You're right, it's too obvious.
We want our name to be inviting.
What's the word for ''light-hearted'' in French?
There isn't one.
l've got it, Niles!
Les Frères Heureux.
The Happy Brothers! Brilliant!
Homey and just hard enough to pronounce to intimidate riffraff.
We'll make it very exclusive.
No sign, no advertising, and an unlisted phone number.
And you could post guards on the roof
to shoot people as they try to get in!
- l believe. Do you believe? - l believe.
- What would you like? - The whole damned place!
And for the lady?
(Up tempo piano music plays)
(Niles) We're a palpable hit.
We're full, except for that table in that dank corner next to the men's room.
That is not a dank corner. That is the enchanted grotto.
l've had nothing but compliments.
Chef Maurice has outdone himself. The menu cannot be improved upon.
Unless it would be to add a soupçon of brandy to the Cherries Jubilee.
l want those cherries to be jubilant.
Daphne, Dad, everything OK?
Oh, yes. Whatever this anguilla is, it's smashing.
Our chef can do things with eels you wouldn't believe.
l arrested a guy for that once.
You really pulled it off, Dr Crane.
Sorry to disappoint you, Dad, but it seems the restaurant is a success.
By tomorrow, it'll be the toast of Seattle.
- What's in there? - Anguilla.
Dear God!
Maurice likes to kill them to order, then serve them with the heads on.
Thank God his speciality isn't roast beef.
- Are those soufflés for table nine? - l'm about to bake them.
l shouldn't second-guess presentation,
but would you be averse to trying something radical?
lnstead of individual soufflés, bake a large soufflé and serve it at the table.
When people hear ''Niles Crane'', l want them to think ''big soufflé''.
As you wish.
- There's a party without a reservation. - Leave them to me.
Hey, Niles, baby!
- Mr Briscoe. May l help you? - Does it look like l need help?
Do you have a reservation?
l know what you're sniffing for. These guys are all alike.
Mr Lincoln wonders if you've a table for me and the lady.
Mr Lincoln's in luck.
Please seat these people in the enchanted grotto.
The grotto? Oh, Bulldog! Enjoy our finest table.
A flash of green and you get what you want.
But look who l'm telling!
Maurice? lt's not to second-guess your creativity,
but...l thought we agreed we'd serve the soufflé in individual cups?
- l was asked to change. - On opening night?
Good Lord, no. Start pouring, man.
lf you're almost finished, l'll call for your car.
Your parking attendant looked familiar.
lt was Otto, the waiter. Didn't have the heart to let him go.
- Hello, Otto. - (Otto ) 'Who is this?'
lt's Dr Crane. Please bring up car 44.
My innovation. This way your car will be waiting when you're finished.
We agreed one large bowl for soufflé.
This is crazy! This is my kitchen!
lt's in my restaurant! One big bowl!
Table 1 2 is still waiting. Don't force me to send them free zucchini.
- That's the ''in'' door. - What did l hit?
- What happened? - Help me get him into the kitchen.
That's the ''out'' door.
- No harm done. - His nose is broken.
- What shall we do? - Start ladling out zucchini.
- He's out cold! - l'll take them to the emergency room.
l'm trying to remain a happy brother,
but suddenly we're without waiters or a bartender.
First rule of the kitchen. Remain calm.
- No, l told you individual cups, you oaf! - l told him one large bowl!
Are you out of your mind?
Why not just serve it in a baseball glove?
Ridiculous! How gauche! l didn't know you had this streak!
Maurice! No, wait! Please let me finish!
- lt was an oversight. - Now what?
We make a battlefield promotion. Congratulations. Our new head chef.
- Thank you. - We've a very important clientele.
Two senators and the head of the lmmigration Bureau.
Sacre bleu!
Any other names you'd like to drop?
Fine, now we have no chef.
No. No. Put the hat down.
You are our new head chef.
l can't cook all this food.
Most of the meals are started. Dad and Daphne can help us out.
- Otto, cancel car 44. - (Otto ) 'Who is this?'
Dr Crane! lt's always Dr Crane!
We need your help. We've got a little disaster.
The staff walked out.
l need you in the kitchen and you behind the bar.
You can gloat later.
l'll pencil it in.
lt's not the first time l've washed up for me supper.
Who'll wait on these tables?
Oh, Frasier.
l'm glad to see you, too. My date, Brad.
- Pleasure. - Pretty great, huh?
- Have you got our special table? - First, l want to discuss something.
- lt's probably some surprise. - Try to fool you!
- What's your poison? - l'll wait for Roz.
l'd have one now.
Honey, l'm really sorry,
but Frasier's waiters had a terrible accident
and he really needs my help.
- l hope you'll try to understand. - No problem.
Could l get a menu and some bread and butter?
You from around here? How about those Supersonics?
Niles is panicking. l don't know if we can pull this off.
Just tell them what happened.
People are more understanding than you think.
Maybe honesty is the best policy.
Excuse me. Ladies and gentlemen, l would just like to say...
- Good evening, Frasier. - Bon appetit!
Gil, l thought you never reviewed opening nights.
l made an exception and brought an entire table of restaurant critics.
Oh, well, that's...lovely.
l don't know if l can accommodate you.
We'll take that one over there.
We're salivating to try anguilla. l hear chef's a wizard with eels.
Eels? That was his old speciality.
You must try his new speciality.
Scrambled eggs.
Eels it is.
Table four now want Sole Veronique without grapes,
spinach instead of broccoli, risotto instead of pasta.
- They also want... - Just tell them, ''No substitutions''!
- l have trouble saying no. - So the guidebooks tell us.
- Do you want to get thrown in the tank? - You're not making this very easy.
You waltz in here, la-di-da, ''extra broccoli, hold the capers,''
then you go out on the fun side.
You want to trade places? Be my guest.
How dare you use that tone?
All right, stop it!
You're not being asked to do anything you've never done in your own homes.
Now, quick, Niles, kill five eels!
Every restaurant critic in Seattle wants anguilla. Kill eels!
How do you suggest l do that?
You're the chef! Throw a toaster in the damn tank!
Not to worry. Eels are on their way.
- Our mouths are watering. - Our chef is in the process of...
frying them now.
Excuse me, this is Veal Piccata. l ordered Veal Marsala.
l'll rectify that at once. l'll be right back.
Niles, this Veal Piccata has to be Veal Marsala.
The mayor's table all want Cherries Jubilee.
Fine. You flame them. How are those eels?
l'm just trimming them now.
- Take them out of the tank! - Not till l'm sure they're dead!
For heaven's sakes!
What was that?
Big blue flash. Cherries everywhere.
Lucky it didn't set off the sprinkler system.
We have a safety delay for this - 1 5 seconds before the sprinklers...
kick in.
- Where do l turn it off? - Over there.
l hope you're satisfied! You thinned my brown sauce.
Good news! That was just a test!
- l want my car! Now! - Yes, ma'am, right away.
Otto, bring car 23. Hurry!
- (Otto ) 'Who is this?' - lt's the voice of God!
Doc, great touch with the sprinklers!
My date's dress is clinging to her like saran wrap!
Every restaurant has to adjust. You'll remember this as an adventure!
And if they don't remember it, l'll remind them.
Please keep us in mind for your next special occasion.
We plan exciting innovations in the weeks to come.
Starting with... our drive-through window.
Number 23 is ready.
How much firepower is necessary to embed a cherry in a ceiling tile?
Another question we should have asked
before entering the exciting world of food service.
Those eels are starting to stink!
Dad, you've circled like a shark. Just give us your speech.
You guys will punish yourselves enough without me chiming in.
- Thanks. - Hey, l'm your dad.
Hello, Happy Brothers Restaurant.
Table for two? No problem. Smoke damaged or non-smoke damaged?
You know, we could tell people he died in the explosion.
# Hey baby, l hear the blues are calling tossed salads and scrambled eggs
# Mercy!
# And maybe l seem a bit confused Yeah, maybe, but l got you pegged
# But l don't know what to do with those tossed salads and scrambled eggs
# They're calling again #
# Scrambled egg's all over my face!
# What is a boy to do? #
Good night everybody!
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Friends - 4x05 - The One With Joeys New Girlfriend
Friends - 4x06 - The One With the Dirty Girl
Friends - 4x07 - The One Where Chandler Crosses
Friends - 4x08 - The One With Chandler in a Box
Friends - 4x09 - The One Where They are Going
Friends - 4x10 - The One With the Girl from
Friends - 4x11 - The One With Phoebes Uterus
Friends - 4x12 - The One With the Embryos
Friends - 4x13 - The One With Rachels Crush
Friends - 4x14 - The One With Joeys Dirty Day
Friends - 4x15 - The One With All the Rugby
Friends - 4x16 - The One With the Fake Party
Friends - 4x17 - The One With the Free Porn
Friends - 4x18 - The One With Rachels New Dress
Friends - 4x19 - The One With All the Haste
Friends - 4x20 - The One With All the Wedding Dresses
Friends - 4x21 - The One With the Invitation
Friends - 4x22 - The One With the Worst Best Man Ever
Friends - 4x23 - The One With Rosss Wedding - part 1
Friends - 4x24 - The One With Rosss Wedding - part 2
Friends - 5x01 - The One After Ross Says Rachel
Friends - 5x02 - The One With All the Kissing
Friends - 5x03 - The One Hundreth
Friends - 5x04 - The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS
Friends - 5x05 - The One With the Kips
Friends - 5x06 - The One With the Yeti
Friends - 5x07 - The One Where Ross Moves In
Friends - 5x08 - The One With All the Thanksgivins
Friends - 5x09 - The One With Rosss Sandwich
Friends - 5x10 - The One With the Inappropiate Sister
Friends - 5x11 - The One With All the Resolutions
Friends - 5x12 - The One With Chandlers Work Laugh
Friends - 5x13 - The One With Joeys Bag
Friends - 5x14 - The One Where Everyone Finds Out
Friends - 5x15 - The One With the Girl Who Hits Joey
Friends - 5x16 - The One With the Cop
Friends - 5x17 - The One With Rachels
Friends - 5x18 - The One Where Rachel Smokes
Friends - 5x19 - The One Where Ross Cant Flirt
Friends - 5x20 - The One With the Ride-Along
Friends - 5x21 - The One With the Ball
Friends - 5x22 - The One With Joeys Big Break
Friends - 5x23 - The One in Vegas
Friends - 6x01 - The One After Vegas
Friends - 6x02 - The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel
Friends - 6x03 - The One With Rosss Denial
Friends - 6x04 - The One Where Joey Loses His
Friends - 6x05 - The One With Joeys Porsche
Friends - 6x06 - The One On the Last Night
Friends - 6x07 - The One Where Phoebe Runs
Friends - 6x08 - The One With Rosss Teeth
Friends - 6x15
Friends 7x01 - The One with Monicas Thunder
Friends 7x02 - The One With Rachels Book
Friends 7x03 - The One With Phoebes Cookies
Friends 7x04 - The One With Rachels Assistant
Friends 7x05 - The One With The Engagement Picture
Friends 7x06 - The One With The Nap Partners
Friends 7x07 - The One with Rosss Library Book
Friends 7x08 - The One Where Chandler Doesnt Like Dogs
Friends 7x09 - The One With All the Candy
Friends 7x10 - The One With The Holiday Armadillo
Friends 7x11 - The One With All The Cheesecakes
Friends 7x12 - The One Where They are Up All Night
Friends 7x13 - The One Where Rosita Dies
Friends 7x14 - The One Where They All Turn Thirty
Friends 7x15 - The One With Joeys New Brain
Friends 7x16 - The One With the Truth About London
Friends 7x17 - The One With the Cheap Wedding Dress
Friends 7x18 - The One With Joeys Award
Friends 7x19 - The One With Ross and Monicas Cousin
Friends 7x20 - The One With Rachels Kisses
Friends 7x21 - The One With the Vows
Friends 7x22 - The One With Chandlers Dad
Friends 7x23 - The One With Monica and Chandlers Wedding Part 1
Friends 7x24 - The One With Monica and Chandlers Wedding Part 2
Friends 9x01 - The One Where No One Proposes
Friends 9x02 - The One Where Emma Cries
Friends 9x03 - The One With The Pediatrician
Friends 9x04 - The One With The Sharks
Friends 9x05 - The One With Phoebes Birthday Dinner
Friends 9x06 - The One With The Male Nanny
Friends 9x07 - The One With Rosss Inappropriate Song
Friends 9x08 - The One With Rachels Other Sister
Friends 9x09 - The One With Rachels Phone Number
Friends 9x10 - The One With Christmas In Tulsa
Friends 9x11 - The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work
Friends 9x12 - The One With Phoebes Rats
Friends 9x13 - The One Where Monica Sings
Friends 9x14 - The One With The Blind Dates
Friends 9x15 - The One With The Mugging
Friends 9x16 - The One With The Boob Job
Friends 9x17 - The One With The Memorial Service
Friends 9x18 - The One With The Lottery
Friends 9x19 - The One With Rachels Dream
Friends 9x20 - The One With The Soap Opera Party
Friends 9x21 - The One With The Fertility Test
Friends 9x22 - The One With The Donor
Friends 9x23-24 - The One In Barbados 1 2)
Frisson des vampires Le
From Beijing with love
From Dusk Till Dawn
From Dusk Till Dawn 3 The Hangmans Daughter
From Hell
From Justin To Kelly (Special Edition)
Frontera La
Frusta e il corpo La
Fucking Amal
Fudoh The New Generation 1996
Fugitive The - The Chase Continues
Fugitives (2000)
Fukssvansen (Chop Chop)
Full Frontal 2002
Full Metal Jacket
Full Time Killer
Fun Movie (2002 Korean) CD1
Fun Movie (2002 Korean) CD2
Fun in Acapulco (Richard Thorpe 1963)
Funeral Parade of Roses
Funeral in Berlin
Funny Girl
Fuochi dArtifizio
Furia (2002)
Fury The (1978)
Futurama 1x01 - Space Pilot 3000
Futurama 1x02 - The Series Has Landed
Futurama 1x03 - I Roommate
Futurama 1x04 - Loves Labors Lost in Space
Futurama 1x05 - Fear of a Bot Planet
Futurama 1x06 - A Fishful of Dollars
Futurama 1x07 - My Three Suns
Futurama 1x08 - A Big Piece of Garbage
Futurama 1x09 - Hell is Other Robots
Futurama 2x01 - A Flight to Remember
Futurama 2x02 - Mars University
Futurama 2x03 - When Aliens Attack
Futurama 2x04 - Fry and the Slurm Factory
Futurama 3x01 - Amazon Women in the Mood
Futurama 3x02 - Parasites Lost
Futurama 3x03 - A Tale of Two Santas
Futurama 3x04 - The Luck of the Fryrish
Futurama 3x05 - The Birdbot of Ice-catraz
Futurama 3x06 - Bendless Love
Futurama 3x07 - The Day the Earth Stood Stupid
Futurama 3x08 - Thats Lobstertainment
Futurama 3x09 - The Cyber House Rules
Futurama 3x10 - Insane in the Mainframe
Futurama 3x10 - Where The Buggalo Roam
Futurama 3x12 - The Route of All Evil
Futurama 3x13 - Bendin in the Wind
Futurama 3x14 - Time Keeps on Slippin
Futurama 3x15 - I Dated a Robot
Futurama 3x16 - A Leela of Her Own
Futurama 3x17 - A Pharaoh To Remember
Futurama 3x18 - Anthology of Interest Part 2
Futurama 3x19 - Roswell That Ends Well
Futurama 3x20 - Godfellas
Futurama 3x21 - Future Stock
Futurama 3x22 - The 30 Iron Chef
Futurama 4x01 - Kif Gets Knocked Up a Notch
Futurama 4x02 - Leelas Homeworld
Futurama 4x03 - Love and Rocket
Futurama 4x04 - Less Than Hero
Futurama 4x05 - A Taste of Freedom
Futurama 4x06 - Bender Should Not Be Allowed on TV
Futurama 4x07 - Jurassic Bark
Futurama 4x08 - Crimes of the Hot
Futurama 4x09 - Teenage Mutant Leelas Hurdles
Futurama 4x10 - The Why of Fry
Futurama 4x11 - Where no Fan Has Gone Before
Futurama 4x12 - The Sting
Futurama 4x13 - Bend Her
Futurama 4x14 - Obsoletely Fabulous
Futurama 4x15 - The Farnsworth Parabox
Futurama 4x16 - Three Hundred Big Boys
Futurama 4x17 - Spanish Fry
Futurama 4x18 - The Devils Hands are Idle Playthings
Fyra Nyanser Av Brunt CD1
Fyra Nyanser Av Brunt CD2